The things I do for Love
by Gintsuki of the Rain
Summary: Sasuke wants Sakura, but he has once again managed to screw himself over, leaving her mad at him again, and him seeking help from the other Konoha Kunoichi. Summary sucks, I'm an OC. PPL are OOC, and Itachi is watching it all on cable. SasuSaku FOR REAL Rated M for language used during my verbal hate for Sasuke
1. Recieving the help he needs

_**The things I do for Love...**_

_**Disclaimer!:**_ KARMA HATES ME! I DON'T WANNA BE NICE TO SASUKE!~sniff~sniff~ And I don't even kick puppies. WAAAHHHAAAAHAHAAAHAAAAA!

_Sasuke:_ Its probably because you are madly in love with a serial killer.

_Gintsuki:_ o.O? HES RIGHT!

_Itachi: _Technically, Kishimoto-Sama is the serial killer, because he is the one that wrote all of it.

_Gintsuki:_ ~smirks~ _**HE'S **__RIGHT!_

_Sasuke:_ ~glares~ That doesn't change the fact that Karma hates you. Or that you don't own Naruto/Naruto Shippuden.

_Gintsuki:_ Well Damn! ~Attacks Sasuke~

A/N: **WARNING!** Contains a _LOT_ of swearing, as well as an OC or two. Maybe more depending on my mood. Created because I thought (at work of all places) that I have been neglecting SasuSaku shipping, even though they're one of my top five fav pairings. And thus I came up with this fic. It is random contemplation based. And I will be an unwilling OC. Also, I will only continue writing this until I become bored with it. Or I actually come up with an ending. Also contains MAJOR OOC-ness.

Enjoy...

You've been warned btw.

_**Chapter 1: Uchiha Sasuke receives the necessary help he requires.**_

(Takes place two weeks after Uchiha Sasuke requests help from the Konoha Kunoichi to get Sakura after a bad attempt at winning her heart, and a harsh refusal, leading to a rather ugly fight between the two, which included some nasty name calling on Sasuke's part.)

_Sasuke: _ You just _Had_ to add that, didn't you?

_Gintsuki:_ Yup!

Chapter 1

Normal P.O.V. (Thought this one would work out better that way.)

Sasuke entered the heavily camera equipped room, and was met with the stern faces of Hyuuga Tenten, Yamanaka Ino(Don't worry, she's married too. We just don't have a last name for Sai.), Nara Sabaku Temari, Yuuhi Kurenai, Namikaze Uzumaki Hyuuga Hinata(DUDE this chick has a LONG name! Her address labels must suck.), Hyuuga Hanabi, Moegi, Shizune, and Tsunade. Each was sitting in their own armchair, and there was a small couch in the center of the room, where he was sure he was supposed to sit.

"Is the media, and the Konoha wide broadcast really necessary?" The stoic Uchiha asked grumpily.

"Yes, it is." Ino replied. "But from this point on, you must not mention the broadcast. Because the volunteer only agreed to its reaching certain places in Konoha, and doesn't know it is actually city wide." Tsunade informed him bitterly. "Tch, Whatever." he said, taking his seat.

"Hinata, please retrieve miss Ame from the other room." Tsunade instructed. "The AUTHOR is the '_Volunteer'_?" Sasuke asked angrily. He was met only with an evil smirk from Tsunade. "We made her an offer she would rather die than refuse." Ino put in. "Tenten, and I will come with you Hinata. I'm sure Gintsuki-san will protest quite forcefully." Temari said.

There was a two minute interlude where there was absolute silence. Then, '3, 2, 1' Sasuke thought, before "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! BUT ITS NOT FAIR! I DON'T WANT TO BE NICE TO THAT ASSHOLE!" "DAMNIT QUIT STRUUGLING!" "Gintsuki-san, Please! Remember the bargain!" "BUT HE'S A TOTAL BASTARD! I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS!" "GINTSUKI IF YOU BACK OUT NOW, THEN TSUNADE WILL NOT KEEP UP HER END EITHER!"

silence...

The door flew open to reveal some very pissed looking kunoichi. Tenten was yanking Gintsuki's left leg, and Temari her right, while Hinata was trying to pry the Rain kunoichi's fingers from the doorway. Ino then walked over to the three and yanked Gintsuki by her long silver braids. Eliciting a loud squeal of pain from the young woman, and causing her to let go immediately. They threw her onto the couch right next to Sasuke, and she quickly stood up and ran to stand up against the far wall behind the a fore mentioned sofa. "I'm a standing kinda girl!" she stated angrily. Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her. "Ame-san." he acknowledged. "A... Uchiha." she replied with a glare. "Let's get down to business shall we?" Kurenai suggested nicely. Turning everyone's attention to the Genjutsu specialist. "Before we begin, may I inquire under what circumstances was miss Gintsuki from the Rain, persuaded into helping me with my... difficulties with Sakura?" Sasuke asked the women before him. Each donning there own creepy smile(minus Hinata cuz she is incapable of such a thing in this fic.)

"Under the circumstances, we were unable to obtain a volunteer that was not a fangirl..." Tsunade started. "And I remembered that Miss Gintsuki-san didn't like you in that way and suggested we ask her." Hinata continued. Hanabi picked up the story from there. "I was sent to summon her from the village hidden in the Rain. And upon her arrival, and the first initial request to help you, she stated she would sooner kiss Orochimaru, then lift a finger to help you." the entire party cringed at the mental imagery. And Ino continued from there, "But then I suggested to Tsunade-sama that we make her a deal." "One she wouldn't be able to refuse." Temari smirked slyly. "And after running the proposal by the counsel..." Moegi started, but was then interrupted by Shizune, who said. "More like their lives were threatened into agreeing." "Anyway, they agreed. And Gintsuki-san accepted the proposal." Hinata went on. "And what exactly was this proposal that Miss Ame would be temporarily willing to help me for?" Sasuke asked tonelessly. The entire party looked to Gintsuki, and Sasuke turned in his seat to do so as well. "If I agreed to help you understand Sakura, and also help the two of you get together through a series of trials the women before us provide, then Uchiha Itachi-sama's life sentence will be relieved, and he will be put on a three year, chaperoned parole, and then re-instated as an Honorable shinobi of the leaf. As well as his former offenses being removed from any record, as well as the villagers' memories. He will be able to live out the rest of his life peacefully in his hometown."

Gintsuki explained.

Elsewhere in a prison cell(that was So **huge** and luxurious it could have been mistaken for a hotel penthouse.) Itachi was watching the entire ordeal on his big screen tv. "That chick loves you more than life itself you know Itachi." Kisame stated seriously.(he's in disguise and its during visiting hours).

"I am aware, thank you Kisame. This may turn out to be rather amusing."

Back in the broadcasting room. Sasuke was staring at Gintsuki, mouth agape, like she was a two headed dragon that couldn't breathe fire or fly. 1

"WELL DON'T JUST STARE AT ME! START THE QUESTIONG AND WWYDI MIND GAMES ALREADY!"2

_**To be continued...**_

A/N: LOL! Quest for Camelot! Epic movie!(1)

WWYDI(2) it means 'What Would You Do If'

Remember, Reviews are loved. And I will probably be posting for this faster than other things, as it is still pretty fresh in my mind.

Yuragimizuumi no Gintsuki.

JA-NE!


	2. Mind games and Mixed signals

_**Disclaimer:**_ As always, I do not own Naruto. And incase some of you were wondering. I have rated this 'M' for _**LANGUAGE!**_ And nothing more.

Continued OOC-ness. You've been warned.

_**Chapter 2: Mind games, and mixed signals.**_

Normal P.O.V. Still...

Sasuke sat there, mouth still hanging open at what Gintsuki said. "You would do all this **JUST** to ensure Itachi gets out of prison, and can live a somewhat natural life?" He asked, still in shock. "DON'T GET ALL 'WOW YOU REALLY LIKE ITACHI DON'T YOU?' ON ME! WE HAVE A RELATIONSHIP TO MAKE HERE!" Ginni screamed at them all.

"Gintsuki-san is right. We have to start helping, and testing Sasuke-san immediately." Hanabi acknowledged. With this said, Sasuke returned to his seat, and Gintsuki returned to glaring a hole into the back of his head.

~Back at the 'Jail cell'~

"Is this... Going to have commercial breaks?" Kisame asked through a mouth full of popcorn.

"I do not believe so." Itachi replied, taking another sip of his tea.

(Cuz the kick ass hot ones ALWAYS drink tea!)

~The Broadcast room~

"Alright. As this was originally Ino's idea, she'll go first." Tsunade said, with the authority only dealing with a village counsel every _Single_ day, can give you.

Ino nodded, then faced Sasuke. "We'll be having Gintsuki act out Sakura. In the event we make you demonstrate. Which, we will." she said slyly then continued. "Okay, the scenario I place before you is this. Valentine's day is around the corner, but you have a mission. Sasuke, I want to see how you handle the situation." she then nodded to Ginni, "If you would." Ginni nodded and did the transformation jutsu. Turning herself into Sakura, and stepping forward. "Alright, lets say that you two have just finished training for the day. Which is the likeliest to happen. Ginni..."

Sasuke stood up to face Gintsuki. "Sasuke?" she said, imitating Sakura's voice perfectly. "Hn." Sasuke replied. "Do you have any plans for Valentine's day?" the fake Sakura asked shyly. "I have a mission." he said dryly.

"THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!" Gintsuki yelled, dropping her henge. Sasuke glared at her, but then realized that, unfortunately, most of the other girls were agreeing with her, and shaking their heads at his cold attitude.

"This scenario can't stand, because I don't ever celebrate Valentine's day." Sasuke stated in his defense.

"But Sakura-chan _does_!" Hinata said sending a cold semi glare at the Uchiha. Of which he was internally shocked. Mentally shaking it off, he looked to Ino for her final decision. She shook her head. "Maybe that was a little too complex to start out with. Let's move on, and come back to it." Sasuke was of course, appalled that they thought something as trivial as a stupid Holiday would be '_too complex_' for him. He was an _**Uchiha**_ for Kami's sake! So throwing Ino a glare, he turned his attention to Hinata, whom seemed to be the person to be making the decisions next.

"I believe we should first understand the depth of Sasuke-san's feelings for Sakura-chan." Hinata said wisely, and everyone nodded in agreement. Even Gin-chan!

"So Sasuke." Tenten said, sounding like a maniacal bitch. "How _DO_ you feel about Sakura?"

"I care for her." he said tonelessly. Everyone in the room face-palmed. "What?" he asked, still toneless. "Well DUH! Sasuke, when you say it like that, you make her sound like the pet hamster you keep in your basement so no one knows its there." Gintsuki said, matter of factly. "Well obviously everyone knows about Chibi now." Sasuke retorted. "YOU HAVE A PET HAMSTER IN YOUR BASEMENT?" Gintsuki yelled.

~Once again in the "Jail Cell"~

Kisame was on the floor caught between choking on his popcorn, and holding his ribs from laughing so hard. "P-pet... Ham... -ster... n-named, _CHIBI_?" he coughed out.

"I told him to keep in mind Karma and coincidence." Itachi stated, the corner of his mouth upturned in an amused smirk.

~Broadcast room~

"Sasuke-san. How much do you care for Sakura-chan?" Hinata prodded in an attempt to get a better answer out of the ice cube. Sasuke merely shrugged his shoulder. Ino, Tenten, Temari, and Tsunade face-palmed again. The other Konoha kunoichi shaking their heads at him, while Gintsuki openly banged her head into the wall repeatedly. "Its' going to be a long day." Tsunade said.

"Alright, I have a scenario to put to you Sasuke." Temari said standing up, and nodding to Gintsuki, who left the room, via the door she was formerly yanked through.

"Yes?" Sasuke said, standing once again. "Ok, suppose you and Sakura are attending a... Party, as a couple. And she takes you along to help her shop for a dress. Here's the scenario. She has tried on a dress that she absolutely adores, and it looks awful on her. How do you tell her? You can come in now Gin-chan." Sasuke turned around to see Gintsuki, once again transformed into Sakura, but this time wearing a hot pink knee length spaghetti strap cocktail dress. Which needless to say, clashed horribly with her bubblegum pink hair. Her eyes turned back to silver as she faced Ino and Temari with a glare. "Do I _HAVE_ to say it?" she seethed. "**YES!** And you have to react to each of his responses as you believe Sakura would." Ino shot back triumphantly. She looked back at Sasuke, and let her eyes fade to green to match Sakura's. "This is _**SO**_ degrading." She said, while she changed her voice back to Sakura's, and then put Sakura's happy, out going smile on her face.

"So Sasuke-kun, how do I look?" she asked giddily, just as Sakura no doubt would have. Sasuke pretended to give her a once over, then... "Awful. Get a different dress." he said, yet again, without emotion. _**~SMACK~**_ the sound of Gintsuki/Sakura slapping Sasuke across the face echoed throughout the room. And Gintsuki dropped her henge yet again, so that she could smirk at him triumphantly.

Touching his cheek in slight shock, he glared at the silver haired rain kunoichi. "You were given orders to react as you assumed Sakura would." he said between gritted teeth. "oh, _PLEASE!_" Moegi yelled exasperated. Sasuke then shot her a glare as well. "You can wipe that look off your face Uchiha." Tsunade said angrily. "CHA! If that _Had_ been Sakura, we would probably find your beaten and bruised Ice cube body half way between here and Europe!" Ino yelled. 'This will most definitely be a long day' He thought to himself, as some of the girls offered him some advice, and Temari and Tsunade agreed that they would continue this exercise until Sasuke could do something RIGHT!

_**To be continued...**_

A/N: _**AGH! ew. Ew! EW! EEEEEEEEEWWWWWW! **_They made me call him _"Sasuke-kun"_!

**UGH!** Gross! ~gag~spit~choke~gag~gag~

I HOPE YOU SASUKE FANS ARE HAPPY! Cuz I'm over here getting SICK! ~shudders~ Just wrong! ACK!

And trust me, this isn't me making a big deal about it. YOU HAVEN'T _**SEEN**_ ME MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF _ANYTHING_ YET!

Reviews are much welcomed. And I **WOULD**__like some reviews thankyouverymuch!

Otherwise I'll have done that for NOTHING!

Just EW!

And yeah, Gintsuki has silver, not GREY! But _Silver_ hair, as well as eyes. I hope to make my profile pic one of my own anime OC pics in the future.

_**REVIEW PLEASE!**_

Ja ne ;P


	3. He's  WARMING UP!

_**He's... WARMING **_**UP?**

_Disclaimer_: Title sucks. But so does this chapter, so read it anyway. And right, I no own. I no own. I DON'T OWN NARUTO DAMNIT! Ps- 'warming up' as in, getting closer. thxs

carry on...

Caution, more swearing.

THIS WILL REMAIN...

Normal P.O.V. (for now)

Gintsuki was once again henged as Sakura. And wearing yet another outfit that looked horrible on her. This one being one of Ino's purple tube tops, and miniskirts. Which look perfectly fine on _Ino_. But on Sakura, not so much. And as a result of Sasuke getting tired of being hit, and starting to retaliate. Gintsuki was now reduced to vocally disapproving his comments on "_Sakura's_" current outfit of choice, and this explains why everyone is currently wearing ear muffs, and the broadcasters are frequently bleeping out words not meant for young villagers' to hear. Gintsuki internally vomited, as she once again twirled in the purple outfit, and said, "Well Sasuke.." "AHEM!" "**-KUN**. What do you think?" all lip reading eyes were now on Sasuke, they had been at this for two days now, and they were all now PRAYING he would make progress soon. "Its' giving me a headache." He said in his emotionless tone. All the onlookers fell forward, face first into the floor. "**THAT'S IT I QUIT! **ITS' ONE THING THAT I'M HELPING THIS EMO BITCH! ANOTHER THING THAT I HAVE TO WEAR _**PURPLE!**_" Gintsuki screamed. (A/N: Gintsuki would rather relive her worst nightmares, AND help Sasuke _without_ complaining, then wear purple. However, seems how she's already wearing it. She'll go on complaining.)

"Gintsuki-chan! Calm down. Take a deep breath." Hinata said soothingly, while rubbing Gintsuki's, now black clad back, while Gin took a few deep breathes. "Now then, repeat after me Gintsuki. 'This is for Itachi's freedom.'" "This is for Itachi's freedom, this is for Itachi's freedom, this is for Itachi's freedom…" and she continued chanting it until she had thoroughly calmed down. Meanwhile, Tsunade was missing.

"MY VILLAGE FOR MIGRANE RELEIVER!"

And Sasuke was getting berated by some angry Kunoichi.

"Really Uchiha. How hard is it to say it nicely? Is it because you know its Gintsuki, and you're just wasting our time? Is that it?" Ino yelled at him. "No." he stated, "Then WHAT!" Temari screamed at him. He didn't answer. "Alright. Let's see. Hinata!" Shizune called to the former Hyuuga, "Hai?" she answered. "When you and Naruto went shopping and you tried on that orange jogging suit to test him, what did he say?" "Oh, well…

_Flash back…_

_Hinata walked out of the dressing room, wearing a bright orange jogging outfit, and knowing it clashed horribly with everything about her, walked out to face her fiancé to give him the final test. _

_What to say when your girl looks absolutely awful in an outfit._

_Once she'd reached him, she put on a huge smile. "What do you think Naruto-kun? I love this outfit, I think I'll get it!" she said enthusiastically. Naruto looked to his still twirling fiancé, and fell out of his chair at the blindingly bright orange sight before him. Orange was his favorite color after all. But this wasn't just orange. It was __**BAM!**__ Look at me __ORANGE!__ And went without saying that it wasn't right for someone like Hinata. In fact, he was having trouble not looking away and screaming how appallingly atrocious it was. But reining himself in, he carefully looked her over, like he knew she expected him to, before he opened his mouth. "Hinata-hime. I don't think that's really your style. I don't want to hurt your feelings. You look amazing. Just, not in this particular color Hime. Maybe in a soft blue?" eyes pleading, and muscles tensed for an outburst of tears, Naruto was thoroughly shocked with Hinata's response. "Thank KAMI!" she yelled, while hugging him. "Naruto-kun! You are simply PERFECT! I know this outfit looks terrible. That was a test, and you passed!" she said, before pecking him quickly on the lips, and rushing to get out of the frightening outfit she was currently in. Naruto sat back down, sweating bullets. "Wow! A test." He said aloud. "Looks like you are worthy of her after all Kid." Came the deep voice of Hinata's father from behind him. Naruto instantly stood, and bowed in thanks to Hinata's father, before the older man left._

_End Flash Back!_

~sniff~sniff~ "WHY CAN'T SAI BE AS SWEET AS THAT!" Ino wailed, while a teary eyed Kurenai tried to console her. "Yeah! When I tested Shikamaru, of course he passed, but he wasn't nearly as sweet about it. Just said, 'that's not right for you. Maybe we should keep looking.'" Explained an also crying Temari. "Alright Sasuke-san. If you can let her know nicely that the outfit is a bad choice. Then you are a step closer." Hinata started "And you're not allowed to use the same things that their husbands' used." Tsunade said, popping out of NOWHERE holding a giant bottle of Sake. "Alright. Once more Gintsuki." Shizune said, handing her an outfit. She walked into the room as Sakura once more, wearing a black and pink striped kimono that ended around mid shin. She twirled in fake enthusiasm. "Sasuke ~held back gag~ -kun! What do you think of my dress?"

Sasuke scrutinized "_Sakura_" for a moment, and took a deep breath. "Not to offend you or anything Sakura. But I don't think that dress is really _you_. How about another style?" he said the last part like a question as he awaited Gintsuki's screaming. "Oh, alright. Let me just go put this one back then Sasuke." ~Tsunade death glare~ "Er, kun."

The room immediately burst into applause. "Well done brat." "Yeah, that was better than Shika-kun!" "SAI IS SUCH A BRAINLESS FAG!" Ino continued to cry waterfalls, while Kurenai and Hinata tried to calm her down. "IT'S NOT FAIR! MINE IS THE ONLY GUY WHO CAN NEVER SAY ANYTHING RIGHT! EVEN EMO-PRINCESS-BITCH CAN SAY **SOMETHING **RIGHT! !"

Gintsuki and Temari soon attempted to assist calming down a mood swingingly preggers Yamanaka Ino.

"Ahem, uh Hinata, Temari. I think Ino should stay with one of you tonight. For her husband's safety." Tsunade suggested. "Hai Tsunade-sama. We'll figure something out." Temari answered, as Hinata was still consoling Ino.

_**The next morning…**_

"Okay Uchiha, round two. Today we're going over how to dig yourself out of the hole you've landed in, after a brutal fight, with some name calling." Temari said. 'I don't think I'm going to like where this is going.' Sasuke thought to himself. He now had every Kunoichi in the room smirking at him diabolically. Then Ino spoke "Today's insult is 'Weak and Stupid fan-girling whore, who can't get over herself.'" The rest of the girls looked at Ino appalled, before catching on and glaring at Sasuke. "She told you _THAT_!" Sasuke yelled. "She tells me everything asshole!" Ino replied. "Idiot!" "That's low even for you Sasuke!" "You're in deeper shit then I signed up for!"

Silence…

Everyone now stared in shocked horror at Hinata. "_WHAT!_" she snapped. "Hinata dear, I think you should go have Sakura give you a check up sweetheart, you've been acting strange lately." Kurenai said soothingly. "You're right Sensei; I have been feeling a bit ill lately. I'll see you all later." Hinata said, and then left on her way towards Konoha Hospital.

~Whereas in the _FRIGGIN LUXERIOUS JAIL CELL_~

"Itachi. I think I've lost it. I'm seeing things!"

"If you believe you just saw the Kyuubi's wife cuss, and scream at my little brother, then there is a simple solution to this."

"But Itachi. That **WAS** what I thought I saw!"

"Then my friend, we have both lost our sanity."

~in the broadcast room~

Sasuke was now pinned against the wall by Temari's hand on his throat. And he just stared at her uncaringly. "YOU LITTLE FUCK! WHAT POSSESED YOU TO SAY THAT TO SAKURA!"

"Temari. I would ask you to put him down immediately. Blocking his wind pipe isn't helping him to explain himself." Tsunade said from behind her. Temari dropped Sasuke, and walked to the other side of the room and then proceeded to punch a member of the camera crew into the next century. "There goes another intern." Someone backstage muttered. Temari then sat down.

"Alright Uchiha, Ino already knows Sakura's half of the story, let's hear it." Tsunade commanded. Still glaring. "It was the day I was released from the hospital. And yeah, I guess I was feeling pretty good about myself…" he was certain he heard the preggers woman mumble 'stuck up prick' but then, it could've been Temari too. "Anyway…"

_Flash back…_

_Sasuke was walking down __Konoha's main street, with an insufferably cocky smirk on his face. Objective, find Sakura Haruno, ask her out, and watch her turn to putty in his hands._

_Phase one of the objective was quickly completed as he spotted her walking down the street with Hyuuga Neji's wife. Nineteen or something like that. Anyway, he waved to them, and beckoned Sakura to come to him. However his smirk faltered when she glared at him, mumbled something to what's her face, and started walking in the other direction. He let her get to the point of nearly disappearing from sight, before he transported directly in front of her. "Sakura." He said, still smirking like a douche bag. "Sasuke." She said flatly, then side stepped him, and started walking again. "Whoa, whoa, Sakura what's the rush? I just wanna talk to you." he said, easily falling into step beside the pink haired Kunoichi. "Your obnoxious smirk says otherwise." She retorted, not looking at him. "How do you know I'm smirking if you won't look at me?" he shot back. She smirked herself. "Because you are." At this Sasuke's smirk nearly fell. Nearly._

"_Sakura will you…" "YAMANAKA INO!" Sakura screeched worriedly, and Sasuke immediately turned his attention in the direction of the Yamanaka flower shop, just in time to see Ino throw her husband to the ground, from his previous position of being held above her head. The blond woman then proceeded to step on his stomach as she walked toward the quickly approaching pink haired medic. "Yes Sakura-chan?" she asked sweetly. "DON'T _'yes Sakura-chan'_ ME! I don't give a damn what your idiot husband said or did, but you __**CANNOT**__ be doing this kind of stuff while you're pregnant! Do you want to endanger your unborn child's Life?" Sakura yelled at her. Ino immediately burst into tears. "I-I'm ssssssooooooo __**SORRY!**__" Sakura then hugged the hysterical woman, who was currently in the middle of suffering some really bad mood swings. "There there Ino, now then, why don't you head over to Temari, and Shikamaru's? I'm sure Sai would be __More__ than happy to take care of the store for you." "Actually I would.. OOF! Right, you go ahead and have fun dear. I'll take care of the shop." Sai told her. Once Ino was well on her way to the Nara compound, Sakura said something to Sai, then darted off toward the east end of Konoha. Sasuke soon caught up, and started walking next to her again._

"_What the FUCK do you want!" she snapped at him. "Go out with me." Sakura stopped dead in her tracks. Not a question. Not a statement. A DEMAND! __***And he's still sporting that cocky smirk!* **__ inner Sakura threw in. she glared at him. "You egotistical, stuck up, arrogant, __**BASTARDASSPRICK!**__ I will __**NOT**__ go out with you!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Hearing such things spill out of Sakura's mouth made something snap inside of Sasuke. He was suddenly angry, very angry, that such a defenseless, and weak pink haired FAN-GIRL would insult him in such a way. He swung at her, but she dodged. "HAVE YOU SUNK SO LOW AS TO HIT A WOMAN NOW ASSHOLE!" She yelled, smirking at him now. "You're no woman. You're just some Weak and Stupid fan-girling whore, who can't get over herself!" after he'd said it, he felt slightly superior at the look of horror on her face. Then her face slowly changed to a twisted, frighteningly sweet fake smile. "But of course Sasuke-kun," she drawled in a fake sweet voice, that caused Sasuke to cringe slightly. Then she continued "You're right, you're always right Sasuke-kun. That's what makes you so damned arrogant. Now then Uchiha-san, I appreciate your offer for a date. However, I must regretfully decline." And then she was gone. Where to, he was certain he didn't want to know._

_End Flash Back…_

"_**LET ME AT IM! LET ME AT IM! SHIZUNE LET GO! INO LET GO! ALL OF YOU LET ME **__**FUCKING**___**GO**_**!**_" Tsunade screamed trying to rip the Uchiha's throat out. "_**I'LL KILL HIM!**_" Sasuke momentarily stole a glance at Gintsuki, whom was calmly filing her nails, while leaning on the far wall smirking in triumph. However, her triumph was short lived as Hinata re-entered the room and tapped her on the shoulder. "Yes Hinata-chan?" "Gintsuki-chan. If Tsunade-sama kills Sasuke-san. The deal will be invalid, and Itachi-san will live the remainder of his life in prison." Gin's smirk fell, as did the rest of her body as she hit the floor. "Well DAMN! _WHY KARMA! I'VE RESCUED DROWNING KITTENS BEFORE! WHY!_" Gintsuki then pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and dialed a number. Putting it to her ear, she whispered a few things into it, then hung up. No sooner had Tsunade gotten her hands around the young Uchiha's neck, then Gin took a deep breath, and screamed "_**TSUNADE-SAMA! JIRAIYA IS STEALING YOUR SECRET SAKE STASH TO THROW INTO THE TRASH!**_" There was immediate silence, and then Tsunade was gone. Sasuke looked at Gintsuki. "Uh, th…" "You can thank me when this is over, and you're still alive. It'll only get worse from here." She cut him off coldly.

TBC

A/N: Okay, so I'm hoping this relatively long-ish chapter will make up for the fact I haven't updated in awhile. But hey, when you live to work, so you can pay taxes to a government YOU DON'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK ABOUT then shit'll happen to ya. Hope you enjoyed this.

Coming soon, chapter 4: Begin Round Two

Poor Ino, her husband is brainless!

Poor SAI! HIS WIFE IS LIKE A FEMALE _HULK!_

AND IS IT EVEN **POSSIBLE** TO BOUNCE BACK AFTER YOU CALL THE WOMAN A _**'WEAK AND STUPID FAN-GIRLING WHORE'**_!

I'll let the reviewers, few as they may be thus far, decide.

Thanks for reading, ja…

~Gintsuki~


	4. Begin round two: Arguing & name calling

_Begin round two: arguments, and name calling_

No Author's not today, just the _**Disclaimer:**_ I don't own Naruto, the show, the series, the manga, it all belongs to someone else. Not me.

ALL I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IS KILLING SOMEONE'S DIPSHIT EX BOYFRIEND! _**MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!**_

Warning: OOC.

You may continue at your own risk…

Normal P.O.V.

~Quick re-cap, Sasuke had a flash back to explain under what circumstances he called Sakura a fan-girling whore, Tsunade tried to kill him, and I, (Meaning Gintsuki) had to (grudgingly) save his life by allowing Jiraiya to take the beating of his life, after framing him. Am I sadistic or what? ;P~

"Alright, now that we've all got a handle on our tempers, why don't we…" Tsunade was cut off as the door slammed open to reveal a breathless Namekaze Uzumaki Hyuuga Hinata. (Whew that's a mouth full.) "GUYS I KNOW WHY I'VE BEEN ACTING WEIRD!" Hinata screamed. Everyone in the broadcast room looked to the flushed former Hyuuga before them, awaiting her explanation. "I' M PREGNANT!" She yelled enthusiastically. "I just ran here from celebrating with Naruto-kun!"

~Silence~

"_**!**_"

The room erupted with the sound of screaming Kunoichi, all of whom glomped Hinata and began congratulating her. "This calls for a celebration, Uchiha your tests can wait until tomorrow. And everyone promptly left the room, leaving Sasuke, and Gintsuki behind. "Why are you still here?" Sasuke asked rudely. "Naruto doesn't like me, cuz I don't like you, and I wasn't invited to celebrate with them, as I'm not a Konoha Kunoichi by any means. But I'm still going to get Hinata a gift."

She explained. "Oh, soo… you wanna go get some lunch? Naruto is still pretty pissed at me too." Gintsuki grinned. "Not even if you were the last man on the planet, and my only other option was to die of starvation." She then walked out of the room, still grinning.

~the next morning~

"Alright, now as I was saying yesterday, we should get back to work, and we should try to contain the internal feelings telling most of us to Kill Uchiha Sasuke." Tsunade picked up where she left off the day before. "Alright, now that Lady Hokage has cleared that up. Congratulations Hinata, I'll drop by later to tell Naruto as well. Anyway, I believe you were all trying to teach me how to 'bounce back' from a fight." Gintsuki's jaw hit the floor at the string of sentences she had just heard coming for the Uchiha. "It _TALKS!_" "Yes Gintsuki, it talks. And _IT_ isn't too happy right now!" he said, glaring at Ginni-chan, whom only shrugged, and threw him the bird. "Did it really have to be her?" "_**YES!**_" the Kunoichi (excluding Gin) all yelled at him. "sheesh…" he grumbled. "Alright people SHUT UP! Gintsuki, please go get changed for the next phase." Tsunade commanded.

Gintsuki shortly thereafter re-entered as a very pissed off looking Sakura. And assumed her position in front of Sasuke. Unbeknownst to the other Kunoichi in the room, she silently mouthed 'I am _SO_ going to enjoy this part.' To Sasuke, whom gulped for he knew he was not allowed to retaliate, on pain of probable death. Gintsuki took a very convincing Sakura stance in front of him, and began speaking. "Well _Uchiha_ what do you want?" she spat his name out like venom, causing Sasuke to flinch. "Well Sakura I um… I wanted to..? Uh, Hinata? What was I doing for this exercise again?" Sasuke said, looking over Gintsuki's shoulder to glance at his best friend's preggers wife. "LET ME AT HIM! I'LL TEAR HIS THROAT OUT!" Ino screamed, lunging for Sasuke's throat, meanwhile Gintsuki was banging her head against a brick wall that came out of NOWHERE! "Sasuke-san. The point of this one is to come up with an apology worth making her forgive you." Hinata said, rubbing her temples in hopes of not turning into Ino. "I totally knew that!" Sasuke said, snapping his fingers.

"This is for Itachi's freedom, this is for Itachi's freedom, this is for Itachi's _**FUCK IT I'M GOING TO **_**KILL**_** YOU SASUKE!**_" It took Tsunade, Shizune, Kurenai, Temari, and Kakashi (whom randomly appeared out of thin air) to hold her back this time. "GINTSUKI! Snap out of it! Think of Sakura! Think of Itachi! Think of the readers! If you won't do it for them! Then do it for me! Do it for your sister!" The room instantly went silent at the new voice. And everyone turned to the doorway to see a Suna Ninja that only few of them recognized. Gintsuki instantly threw herself at the girl, whom was the same height, and appeared to be the same age as well. She bore a strikingly close resemblance to Gintsuki. Whereas Gin has Shimmering silver hair and eyes, and was a Rain Ninja. This girl had vibrant Purple eyes, and dark violet hair with lavender highlights, and was a Sand Ninja.

The two girls separated, "V. how did you know where to find me?" Gin asked, anime style puppy eyes and everything. "I was on a mission to Ame recently, and when I stopped by your apartment, the land lady told me you were summoned to Konoha. When I got to Fire nation, I just followed the _**many**_ voices screaming death threats at Sasuke-san. And I stopped by Naruto's to find out why everyone was trying to kill the Uchiha, and he explained everything to me. To be perfectly honest I'm not sure how you lasted this long without me. Naruto showed me the footage of the ugly outfit tests." This new Ninja explained, cringing slightly at the last part. Suddenly Tsunade seemed to remember who it was and stepped forward. "I'm so very glad you stepped in when you did Vaioretogetsu. Would you mind helping us out?" Tsunade asked. "Of course Tsunade-sama." She said, bowing respectfully. Gintsuki then walked over to Sasuke and whispered in his ear. "You had better thank God that my sister showed up, or you'd be missing your family jewels right now at the very _least_." Sasuke gulped again, then regained himself. "Your sister is a Suna Ninja?" he asked, dumb founded. "Yeah, twin sister actually! You got a problem with that dipshit?" she spat at him. "YURAGIMIZUUMI NO GINTSUKI! I _know_ you are more mature than this! Show some restraint woman!" Vaira yelled at her. "Yes _**MOM**_!" Gintsuki hissed, glaring at her sister. "DAMNIT GINNI! Don't start this! You know that's not how I meant it!" "Bullfuck! You're always like this!" they argued. Ino leaned over towards Temari, "I can see the resemblance." She murmured in the other blonde's ear, causing her to snicker. The arguing sister then turned to glare at Ino. "CAN IT INO-PIG!" they both yelled at her, making the very preggers Yamanaka to hide behind Temari.

"All right," Gintsuki started, quickly executing the transformation jutsu, water style, and turning into Sakura once more. "Take two Uchiha. Begin!" she quickly took her pissed off Haruno pose in front of him, and took an exasperated breath. "Yes Sasuke." She demanded. "S-sakura… I…" "Oh so it's' 'Sakura' now, is it? Last time I checked it was '_Fan-girling stuck up whore!_'" she said, glaring at him in hopes of making him melt into a puddle of puke, so she could go home somewhat happy. Sasuke took a deep breath to steady himself, then glared back at her. "If I recall correctly, it was YOU, that call ME, an '_Egotistical, stuck up, arrogant, bastardassprick!_'" He shot right back, clearly fuming, and having momentarily forgot it was Ginni he was talking to, not Sakura.

"Well **Sasuke**, you Are egotistical, you Are arrogant, and you Are stuck up! The 'bastardassprick' was just a bonus!" she yelled back, clearly enjoying herself, although her eyes still looked like she was pissed off. (A/N: Somebody _**PLEASE**_ give Gintsuki props for her mad acting skillz!)

"I can't believe we're fighting again! Damnit Sakura! I'm trying here, I know I shouldn't have demanded you go out with me, I should have just come out at the very beginning and said this! Haruno Sakura I'm Sorry!" he then grabbed Sakura and kissed her fiercely, yet passionately. Then he seemed to come to a realization, he, Wasn't. Talking. To! _Sakura!_

He immediately let go of Gintsuki, and her henge dropped to reveal a very green Ame Kunoichi.

"Oh. My. _**KAMI!**_" Vaira yelled, shooting across the room to grab her sister, she then pulled Gintsuki's arm over her shoulder, and bolted out of the room. No sooner had the door shut behind them then…

_**BLAGH-GAG-CHOKE-BLAGH-GAG-GAG-COUGH-SPEW-CHOKE-BLAGH!CHOKE-SPEW-GAG-BLAGH-CHOKE-GAG-COUGH-COUGH-SPEW-GAGGING-SPEWING-CHOKING-COUGHING! VOMIT!**_

"_**AHHHHHHHHHHHHH-gag-HE-choke-**_**FUCKING-blagh-**_**KISSED ME**__**! !**_"

~more spewing~

Sasuke turned to face the Tsunade. "Um, does that count as a pass?" Tsunade nodded. "Good, uh, may I go wash my mouth out now please?" he asked, Tsunade nodded once more, and Sasuke left. Tsunade turned to the camera crew, "First one of you to get me the strongest bottle of Sake in the fire nation gets a raise." faster than any NORMAL civilians should be able to move, the Kunoichi (and Kakashi) were alone in the broadcasting room, awaiting the many bottles of Sake they were about to receive. Then Hinata, and Ino started walking towards the door. "Where are you two going?" Shizune asked, recovering from her shock. "Ino-chan and I can't have alcohol. We're going out for ice-cream." Hinata replied. "Oh, okay you two have fun." Kurenai waved.

~Meanwhile in the penthouse jail cell~

"Dear Kami have mercy on her. You think she'll be okay Itachi?" Sasori asked, grabbing Kisame's abandoned pop-corn.

"It is difficult to say Sasori, she may very well be in the hospital for a while. As I am quite certain she still doesn't eat before noon, and it is still only a quarter till. Therefore her stomach was empty before that entire episode." Itachi explained.

"Ouch, that will definitely have her out for quite some time. You think we should check to see if Kisame is alright?" they both glanced at the bathroom door where Kisame had disappeared behind, only to see him walking out, looking quite sickly for an S-class criminal.

"Oh look Itachi, an instant replay!" Sasori shouted, immediately Kisame turned dark green, and ran back into the bathroom.

"No Sasori, I believe he will be just fine." Itachi smirked, Sasori smirked back.

"I believe you are right my friend." And Sasori continued eating the popcorn.

_**TBC**_

A/N: I still feel sick. _**I HOPE YOU'RE ALL HAPPY! **_ UGH! Excuse me… ~sounds coming from the restroom~ Gintsuki returns~ Sorry about that, anyway. I've lost my inspiration for this one temporarily, so I was winging it on this chapter. Hope at least _YOU_ enjoyed it. Just **WRONG**! ACK!

Ew…

Alright, from now on, if I don't receive the number of reviews as matches the number of the chapter. Then I won't update until I do. Deal? I think it's fair!


	5. Sasuke's big mouth, and Bigger Pride

_Sasuke's big mouth, and bigger pride_

A/N: I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY _**I'M **__**SORRY!**_

okay, that done with, I'm kinna rushing this chappie, in order to plz the pplz I have greatly displeased!

If that made sense, welcome to the insane asylum. Take a number, we'll introduce you to your roommate shortly. Okay, moving on to my current issues. I am _**100%**_ **AGAINST** dating co-workers, which doesn't seem to work with the fact that I am highly interested in one, and my boss is a crazy match maker. (She's been playing match maker for nearly 14 years now, and her success rate is zero out of hundreds of attempts) AND I'LL BE **DAMNED** IF I'M HER FIRST SUCCESS!

_**BUT HE'S FUCKING **_**HOTT!** Fuck my life...

_**Disclaimer:**_ Vaira: Once upon a time, long ago there lived a beautiful princess nam...

Ginni: Da **FUCK?**!

Vaira: Wha..? Oh yeah, I forgot. Lol, oops. Gin and I don't own Naruto, shippuden, manga, blah, blah, blah...

...On with the show.

~~~ WHAT ABOUT ME!

Gin: Da** FUCK?**!

Vaira: IT'S SHORTY BACK FROM HIS MISSION!

Gin: SHORTY!

~They both give him a hug~

Gin: Right, intro. Audience, this is our younger brother, Aoshorigetsu, for short, Shori, or Shorty. Lol, you get it? He has light blue spiky hair, blue eyes, and wields two swords. He is more buff then Kisame, and stands at a nice 7'4'' even. Shorty, this is the audience of 'The things I do for Love'

Shorty: 'Sup, peepz! ~whispers~ Anyone besides me notice that my sisters' are demented?

V&G:_** I HEARD THAT!**_

Shorty: Gotta run, nice meeting you all! Especially the hot blond in the front row.. ~runs for the hills~

V&G: GET BACK HERE AND TAKE IT LIKE A GIRL WOULD HAVE YOU WHOOSE!

Chapter 5...

Sasuke's big mouth and bigger pride.

Normal P.O.V.

~Quick re-cap~ Sasuke was trying to come up with a _'touching'_ way to apologize to Sakura, that would make her forgive him. He was practicing with Gintsuki, whom was using a henge to act out the part of Sakura, and Sasuke was so busy making the apology real, that he forgot it wasn't Sakura and kissed Ginni. Once he realized what happened, he let go and backed away, and Vaira-chan was barely able to get Ginni to the bathroom before she got sick.~

Sasuke sat on the sofa once more, ten angry Kunoichi glaring at him, and sweat dripping down his neck. "I said it was an accident..." he was immediately cut off by Vaira, "BULLSHIT IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! YOU **TONGUED** MY SISTER! AND NOW SHE'S IN THE _**HOSPITAL!**_"

"I'm SORRY! And I didn't tongue her!" "Tell that to the people who had to witness this!" Moegi yelled, eyes red and swollen from the images. "_**SHIT!**_ This is broadcast throughout the entire village!" Sasuke yelled, everyone went silent. And then, "Those poor kids!" Ino wailed, tearing up. Everyone else groaned. A moment later Tsunade was clearing her throat to gather everyone's attention. "Anyway, with Gintsuki in the hospital, Vaioretogetsu, would you mind stepping in?" everyone shifted their attention to the fuming Suna Ninja, "HELL YES I MIND! I've seen how badly Uchiha sucks, every one of you has attempted and/or plotted his murder, and now Ginni is in a coma! I _**Will NOT**_ assist Uchiha Sasuke in any way!" Sasuke slumped into the couch, _**'looks like our only option is a whoring fangirl now. We're never gonna get Sakura at this rate.' **__'Shut up! At least I'm trying! That's gotta count for something right?' __**'only in fairytales, and bad fan fiction.'**__ 'Well shit!'_ "However," Vaira began again, "If I _did_ step in for Gintsuki, I would technically be helping Itachi, and therefore Ginni in all essence." she finished with a smirk. "Excellent! Let's begin." Kurenai stated excitedly, "Let's steer clear of the begging for forgiveness though, we don't want our stand in volunteer in the hospital as well." Tenten suggested, and Sasuke just rolled his eyes.

"Alright, let's try something different." Hinata supplied, "Like what?" Vai asked, "Well we all know Sasuke has an ego bigger than the titanic, so let's try pickups. Like if Sakura were to be at the bar (not surprising) and flirting with a guy or two, that _**aren't**_ Sasuke." she suggested. "Hinata that's brilliant!" Ino squealed. ~riiing~~~

"Uh, that's mine..." Ino said as she flipped her cell phone open. "Hello? OH SAKURA-CHAN! No I'm fine, why? … appointment? What appointment? Sai? No he _DIDN'T_ tell me I was supposed to see you at the hospital today. Calm? OF COURSE I'M CALM! WELL HELLZ YEAH I'M GONNA KILL SAI!" "this doesn't look good." Vai whispered to Temari, whom nodded back. "INO CALM DOWN!" every Shinobi, camera person, and broadcasting personnel in the room looked at the youngest Hyuuga. "WHAT! A girl can't get overly annoyed after sitting here for almost a week and having to deal with non-stop hormonally imbalanced Kunoichi, and Uchiha!" everyone agreed with her, (minus the hormonally imbalanced Uchiha, and preggers ladies.)

"Alright, moving forward." Vaira said, as she put her hands together in a sign. "TRANSFORM!" she turned into Sakura, a few seconds later, Gaara, Kiba, and Kankurou walked in, with the necessary furnishings needed to simulate a bar. Then after Vai/Sakura was seated, they each took a seat around her.

~Elsewhere in a penthouse, I meant jail cell~

"I swear if _ONE_ of them lays a hand on my wife I'll kill them, and I'll use their bodies for puppets!" Sasori said, glaring at the television. "Chillax Ginger! Your wife can handle herself, she needs to be able to, if she's put up with you this long. Hell why do you think no one wanted to be your partner in Akatsuki?"

Kisame bantered. "Is that why I was teamed with the snake pedo? I thought it was because of his liking for young men." Kisame immediately burst into laughter. And Itachi chuckled quietly. "Oh there you are Itachi. Where have you been?" Kisame asked. "I had an errand." he replied shortly. "Sasori, would you kindly inform me of what I have missed?" he asked the ginger. "But of course. Ever since Gintsuki fell into a coma, there was a contest to see who could glare your brother into hell first. All were obviously unsuccessful. Then the fifth Hokage prevailed upon my wife to participate in her place for the time being, she accepted seeings how this would benefit you, and in so, my sister-in-law. It was then decided that they would put Sasuke's enormous ego to the test, by having other men hit on Sakura. Did I leave anything out?" Sasori finished with a question, directed at Kisame. "Only that the loud blond chick wants to kill her husband... er, again, and that the little Hyuuga screamed at her, then called Chibi Uchiha hormonally imbalanced." Kisame supplied. "Ah, that would answer the inquiry as to why Sasori would attempt to turn his cousins to puppets." Itachi said. "Indeed." said a voice from behind them, in the darkest corner of the room.

~broadcast room~

~girlish giggles~ "Kiba you're such a charmer!" Sakura/Vai said, hitting his shoulder playfully. "I'm just getting started." he replied flirtatiously. She giggled again, while gagging on the inside. However, in the opposite corner of the room, was a fuming Uchiha. Yes, he was well aware that it wasn't Sakura pretending to flirt with Kiba. But the _**Idea**_ of it being Sakura was just as irritating.

He began to weigh the pros and cons of walking up to them and breaking it up. In order to do so with all his limbs still intact, he'd have to come up with some smooth, subtle way to get her away from Kiba. _**'I'VE GOT IT!'**_ _'yeah?' __**'DUH! Kiba is afraid of us. HULLLLOOOOOOOO!'**_ internally smirking, he waited patiently for Kiba to turn his attention to the death glare he felt on the back of his head, once Kiba did turn his attention to him, Sasuke was satisfied to see sweat dripping down Kiba's face, before Kiba gave Vai/Sakura his apologies and left the building. Kankurou left shortly after Kiba did, the only person left to glare at being Gaara.

As afore mentioned Kazekage started walking towards Vai/Sakura, Sasuke gave him the scariest death glare he was capable of, Gaara flipped him the bird, turned his back to Sasuke, and offered his hand to Vai/Sakura to dance. ~club music starts playing randomly~ She accepts, and they start, well dancing. Like most people would do in a club. About two and a half minutes later Sasuke couldn't stand it, and walked over to them. "I'm cutting in." he demanded, Gaara looked at him boredly, meanwhile Vai/Sakura stared at him angrily, and impatiently. "Sasuke, you'll have to wait your turn, Gaara and I are dancing right now." She said to him in a warning tone. He glared at her, "I said I'm cutting in. hands off Gaara." He demanded. "Stop being rude Sasuke, I'm _trying_ to have some fun!" she was pissed now. Sasuke then grabbed her arm, and yanked her away from Gaara. "We're leaving." He hissed out, and started to walk away. Suddenly Vai/Sakura ripped her arm away. "_**You**_ can leave. But _**I**_ am **staying**. I came to have a good time, and you aren't going to ruin that." She growled at him. He activated his sharingan out of pure rage, and reached for her arm. She dodged, and turned back into Vaira, at the same time that Ino called(screamed at the top of her preggers woman lungs) "_**STOP NOW UCHIHA!**_" Sharingan off, he realized he had just majorly screwed up.. again…

~_Back in the "Jail Cell"~_

"I'LL KILL THE FUCKING CHIBI! **LET GO DAMNIT!**" Sasori yelled, fighting off Kisame, and Pein with all his might. "Itachi, aren't you going to even ATTEMPT to help save your brother's life?" Kisame called to the eldest Uchiha, whom was sitting at a desk, writing a letter. "No, you are doing quite fine, I'm sure Sasori will surrender shortly." Itachi replied. Just then the television set began yelling. "Sasori calm yourself! The hormonally imbalanced lesser Uchiha will get what's coming to him!" Immediately Sasori calmed down. "Saved by the wife… So Leader-sama, you needed something?" Kisame said as a way to break the tension. "Deidara has returned." And Pein and Kisame were gone.

_~Broadcasting room~_

Gintsuki walked into the room cell phone to ear, "Yes Dr. Sakura, I'll take the medicine twice daily. I understand no missions… wait what? Oh, nothing too stressful for a few weeks…" she paused to death glare at Sasuke. "Not making any promises Doc." And she hung up. "Vai, Your husband called you twice. Turn your cell back on." She said to her sister, "I left it in Suna. I was on a mission remember?" "Excuses, excuses. Please don't tell me what I missed. I passed Ino on the way over here, she looked ready to go into labor." Tsunade smiled sinisterly, "Vaira opted to fill in for you, and doubled as Sakura flirting, and Dancing with men at a bar." "The guys still alive?" Ginni asked, "Yes." Hanabi answered. "However, Sasuke blew his top, and tried to force her to leave the bar early. And I _**do**_ mean force." Temari smirked, just wishing someone would slit his throat already. "thisisforItachi'sfreedomandhislifeback… this is for Itachi's freedom and his life back. THIS IS **ALL**FOR ITACHI! _**SO WHY IN HELL WAS VAIRA THE CENTER OF HAMSTER BOYS RAGE!**_" "Now now Gintsuki, remember what Sakura said about stress." Kurenai reminded, Gintsuki took a few deep breathes. "I'm cool. Vaira, Sasori was watching that, right?" "Uh, huh.. why?" "Go home with him, and have a bowl of ice cream." Gintsuki told her, "GO HOME! BUT GINNI-NEE-SAMA! VAIRA-NEE-SAMA! I JUST GOT HERE!" Said a young girl from the doorway. She looked to be about 15, and had aquamarine hair with light blue ends, her eyes were black with red pupils. "Tora you are supposed to be home training for the Chunin exams!" Vaira scolded. "But Nee-sama! You've been gone two weeks longer than you said you would be! And Hanabi-san called last night and told me Ginni-nee-sama was in a coma!" "Well I'm not in a coma, so go train! Since you're in town anyway, go see if one of our friends here has some free time to train with you." Gintsuki negotiated. "I'LL GO ASK GAAR…" "NOT Gaara! You spend more time lazing about with him, than you do training!" "Fine, I'll see if Neji-sama can help me." And then she turned around and ran… ..in the opposite direction of the Hyuuga estate. "I'll go and get her…" and Vaira left as well. "Uh, guys? I never called Tora…" Hanabi said confusedly. And everyone shrugged it off.

_Later…_

"Ahem, are you all finished yet?" Sasuke asked, as Temari, and Kurenai finished tying him to a wooden chair, and stepped away. They only chuckled, and smirked at him sadistically, while their eyes glowed with evil intent. "Not nearly." Tsunade said, stepping forward. Next thing he knew, there was a big screen tv in front of him, and Gintsuki was popping in a dvd, while also looking extremely scary as described before. "This will only hurt a lot." She said, then performed a Jutsu, and smacked his forehead. Suddenly he could no longer move his head, or even blink his eyes. he could still talk, he was just being painfully forced to look at the television screen. Several hours later, he was trembling from the torment. As he had just been forced to watch, 'The Note Book', 'A Walk to Remember', 'Remember Me', 'P.S. I Love You', 'The Twilight series', and several other sobby chick flicks who's titles alone cause Gintsuki to throw up! (Though I must concede, that even if I hate chick flicks, those first two are still personal favs.)

The tv was removed, the bonds undone, and the jutsu released. And as Sasuke lie in a heap on the floor, the Kunoichi in the room started to discuss something in whisper. "Alright Uchiha, your fate has been decided." Tsunade said, as he stood up and backed himself against the wall, "My fate?" "Yes, from now on, when you fail one of the tests, you get punished. Though we've used up all the chick flicks in the immediate area, we do still have every Barbie movie made, romance novels, bad fanfiction featuring Sakura paired with Itachi, and…. Girly gossip." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he screamed, grabbing his head. Next moment Gintsuki grabbed his throat and slammed him against the wall, everyone jumped to tear her off him. But she put a kunai to his temple. "One step closer by any of you and I destroy the subject of our deal here and now!" everyone immediately backed off. "Now you listen to me Sasuke. This isn't about you, or however they choose to torture you. Nor is it about me and my torment! This is about your relationship with Sakura (which in my opinion is six feet under at this time), and Itachi's freedom! If you let go of your ego, and just LEARN what these women are trying to teach you! Then you might be able to get Sakura back! And we can all go home somewhat happily! Now tell me Uchiha, is this woman worth endless hours of chick flicks?" "mmhmhmermm." "WHAT?" "yes." "Is she worth endless hours of Barbie?" "Yes." "Worth endless hours of romance novels!" "Yes!" "ENDLESS HOURS OF SOPPY FANFICTION FEATUREING YOUR BROTHER!" "YES!" "ENDLESS GIRLY GOSSIP!" "YES!" "_TORTURE!_" "_YES!_" "**DEATH!**" "_SAKURA IS WORTH ALL THAT AND MORE! I'D GO TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH, AND BACK UNTIL THE END OF ETERNITY FOR HER!_" "Good, that's all I wanted to know." Gintsuki said, as she put away the kunai, and let Sasuke fall to his knees. He stood up a few minutes later, "Next test Tsunade!" "If Sakura lies to you. For example, if she were to show up late in meeting you somewhere, and said it was because she was hanging out with Naruto. But Naruto just left, and he had been there with you the past two hours. What's the best course of action?" realizing they were no longer asking 'what do you do?' but now it wasn't what he would have done before, now they need for him to show them the proper way to handle the situation, not the Sasuke way. "Gintsuki, would you please act out Sakura for me once again?" he asked politely. "uh, ok..? TRANSFORM!" now turned Sakura, she sat down beside him. "Sorry I'm late Sasuke-kun, I was hanging out with Naruto, and he just wouldn't let me go." She said with a smile, "I see. Sakura, is anything the matter?" he asked, slightly concerned. "Um, no. why?" "Because Naruto just left, and he was here for a few hours. If something's wrong, or you have some other things going on. You can tell me." He said with some affection in his voice. "And you won't get mad?" "Mad? No, never. Depending on what it is you feel you can't tell me, I may get a little upset. But I couldn't get mad at you. Not anymore." "I-I-I wasshspojgvbfsift…" "Come again?" "I …" "Birthday gift? But you didn't have to lie about that." "AND CUT! I'm sorry dude, but for one thing this is getting too mushy nasty for me, and for another, you are getting WAY too into my personal space!" Gintsuki yelled, after undoing her jutsu and leaping to the other side if the room. "Uh, sorry..? Was that alright?" " WHYYYYYY! WAHYYYYY MEEEEEEE! WHY CAN'T SAI DO THAT! WHY DIDN'T YOU GUYS DO THIS FOR HIM! WHY IS IT SAKURA ALWAYS GETS THE BEST OF EVERYTHING! WHY DO I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH AN INSENSITIVE, EMOTIONLESS, SLIGHTLY HOMOSEXUAL ASSHOLE!"

Apparently Ino was back from her check up, and had witnessed enough to make her cry. So unfortunately we will all be alternating between calming her down, and saving Sai's sorry lightly Gay, yet fine looking Ass. So until then…

TBC

A/N: I know all I do is hate on Sasuke in this fic, but that's kinda the point here. Anyway, I'll probly be ending this one soon, and I hope you've all been paying attention to what Itachi's been doing, as it will all matter in the future.


	6. He's Learned Something

_**Chapter 6~**_

_**He's learned something...**_

Ignoring A/N, cuz My life is still non-existent, and you guys probably don't give a shit about my issues, I'm just giving you the disclaimer.

_**Disclaimer:**_ I don't own anything, not even a cat anymore as he recently passed. So as fair warning this chapter is written out of pent up aggression towards my dad for prepping my beloved pet for taxidermy, and making me clean it up when he was done. Excuse me while I get sick again.

~Re-cap~

...Vai stepped in, Sasuke failed, Ginni got back from the hospital threatened Chibi Uchiha's life, screamed some sense into him, and he's finally catching on.

Meanwhile we established that Sai has a fine ass, which is slightly gay according to his emotional, and homicidal wife. If I've left anything out, please inform me.

~Broadcast room~

"Let's get this shit done. How much longer is left on the Barbie movie?" Tenten asked as they stared at the closed door Sasuke had been dragged behind only an hour ago.

"I can hear the last song, so another two-three minutes." Hanabi answered her.

"I can't believe the idiot still keeps failing!" Ino exclaimed.

"Well Ino in his defense, they were practicing controlling his jealousy in relation to Sakura's fanclub/'patients'." Shizune input.

"Wow... there is still someone among us willing to come to his defense, and it was the same one to suggest the test!" Ginni said surprised, triumphantly emerging from the TV room, a weak and suicidal looking Uchiha behind her.

"So how did it go? We heard girlish screams of terror." Ino taunted. Sasuke shot her a weak glare.

"That was the movie Yamanaka." he retorted.

"Sounded like live action to me bitch." Hinata added as she flipped him off, and finished her takeout.

"YAY! Hinata I love you ten times more when you're pregnant!" Hanabi squealed hugging her sister.

Getting back to business a short time later, found Ginni/Sakura flirting with a sparing partner secretly from her fanclub.

The young man in question wasn't actually from Sakura's fanclub, but Gintsuki's. And Tsunade thought it best not to mention it to her.

"Himitsu-kun you're such a charmer. You don't need to flatter." Sakura/Gin giggled, Sasuke silently fumed, and Himitsu grinned.

"I'm not flattering, you are the most beautiful Kunoichi I've had the pleasure of meeting. Anyway, It's still early afternoon, would you like to grab lunch with me before work?" He asked politely, and Sasuke turned red in the face where he stood in the corner. It took him a moment, but he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I'm sorry Himitsu-kun, but I'm supposed to meet Sasuke-kun for lunch. He said he had something important to talk to me about, and I don't think it's something he'd like just anyone to hear, otherwise I'd ask you to come along. Sorry." She replied sullenly.

_'Okay asshole, she turned you down, and practically said she has a date. Walk away now..' _ Sasuke thought to himself.

"Coffee then? I'll walk you to your date, and we can pick up some coffee on the way." Himitsu offered, it was becoming clear to Sasuke now that he was grasping at straws.

"You don't have to do that it's not actually a date either. Also I'm sorry I actually don't drink coffee." S/Gin laughed nervously. Himitsu just smirked.

"He's just a friend of yours? Well it's no trouble at all, I can walk you to the restaurant." He repeated the offer, freshly renewed confidence in his voice.

It wasn't until Himitsu had grabbed her hand when they were about to start for 'the restaurant' that Sasuke intervened.

"Hello Sakura, I came to pick you up for lunch. This a friend of yours?" he asked calm and cool without any frustration in his tone.

"Oh hi Sasuke-kun. You really didn't need to pick me up, and yes this is Tenshi Himitsu-kun. Himitsu-kun, this is Uchiha Sasuke-kun." S/Gin introduced.

"Pleasure to meet you Uchiha-san." Himitsu said, forced to drop S/Gin's hand in order to shake Sasuke's. And she snatched her hand away from his person in order to move, so as to stand an equal distance from each of the two males.

"Likewise Tenshi-san. Sakura are you ready to go?" Sasuke said turning to her.

"Hai. Just let me grab my kunai that I used sparing." she replied as she walked away, leaving the two men alone. Gintsuki walked to the other end of the couch, and waited.

Sasuke nodded at the man before him, and started walking away. But Himitsu being a fan of Gintsuki's, and by extension, hating Sasuke for getting to spend so much time with her. Decided to taunt him a little.

"She won't put up with you forever you know. She's unattached, and independent. Anyone could snatch her away from you any second. Maybe even me for all I know." He said in a menacing tone.

Tsunade made to stop Himitsu, his end of the deal already fulfilled, but was stopped by Ino.

"No... I want to see how he does." she whispered, nodding towards Sasuke.

"Is that so? Well for your information she isn't 'putting up with me', she is with me of her own free will, and its because she's independent that she can leave me whenever she feels like it. So if you'll excuse me, my girl is waiting." Sasuke replied just as cooly.

"Well you must be pretty over confident to call her your girl when she herself told me the two of you aren't together. As a matter of fact, I probably have a better chance as she allowed me to hold her hand when I offered to walk her to whatever place you were meeting her at. Face it Uchiha, you've been friend zoned." Himitsu taunted further.

Now Ino knew Sasuke couldn't take a whole lot more of this, so she signaled Gintsuki to intervene.

"No way, it's just getting good!" She whispered enthusiastically.

Sasuke walked up to Himitsu so they were face to face, trying to intimidate the other man.

"You better watch yourself Tenshi, sounds like you're trying to start a fight." Sasuke grit out between clenched teeth.

"I'm just saying Uchiha, that you're not man enough for the woman I..." Before Himitsu could finish his sentence Sasuke had punched him in the face, and tackled him to the floor, trying desperately to strangle the other man before any of the kunoichi in the room could tear him away.

He was unsuccessful however, and the annoying fanboy was allowed to live.

"Himitsu are you alright?" Gintsuki asked as she helped him to his feet.

"I am now Gintsuki-hime. Please give up on the Uchiha and Marry me! I only accepted this offer to see you, I had to see you to tell you... Gintsuki-hime? Where are you? Wait... how'd I get to the desert? GINTSUKI-HIME! I'LL FIND YOU! I LO..."

"And so carries on the ramblings of a fanboy in a genjutsu. Now onto more important matters. WHO THE FUCK LET A FANBOY OF MINE WORK WITH ME!" Ginni screamed, while Hanabi and Temari drug Sasuke back into the torture room, and they began reading the latest steamy ItaSaku installments on Fanfiction.

"Well technically it was Temari's idea to use a fan of yours instead of a fan of Sakura's in order for the acting to be more believable..." Ino began explaining.

"But it was Tsunade-sama's idea to tell the fan that you were dating Uchiha Sasuke." Moegi blurted.

"_**WHAT!**_" The scream from Gintsuki could be heard on her home Island, the hidden Isle Igen.

Okay a short while later, and several attempts to remind herself that it wasn't very diplomatic to assassinate the leader of an allied village, had us back to square one. A fuming Gin, and an equally fuming Uchiha. The latter of whom was surrounded by Kunoichi that all wished him dead.

"Uchiha, I think it's time for a test run." Tsunade stated seemingly at random.

"What do you mean a test run?" Sasuke asked slightly taken aback. Ten kunoichi stared back at him, evil looks spelling certain death upon each of their faces. ~gulp~

_~Konoha Hospital~_

The sign of the white building looked as if it were yelling at Sasuke as camera crews were skillfully hidden with each of the Kunoichi in order to get this from all angles. Sasuke knew he wasn't ready to try talking to Sakura yet. Hell it had only been a few weeks since their argument, and last he'd heard she used Genjutsu to turn her practice dummies into him when she trained. Not a mental image Sasuke enjoyed living with. He steeled himself and took a deep breath when he saw Sakura walk out of the hospital with a patient. A patient he recognized as Himitsu. _'Good feelings gone.'_ Was his last thought as he approached the two.

~Back to the penthouse holding cell~

"Itachi you're missing it!" Kisame called from where he sat on the couch, Deidara next to him stuffing all three of his mouths with popcorn as he watched on the edge of his seat while Sasuke approached the man he'd attempted to strangle hours before.

"I can see it from here Kisame. So long as you do not maneuver any further to your left." Itachi called from his desk as he studied three different maps of the same geographical aria, whilst reading over what Kisame could make out to be shipping records. And he had a set of sealed scrolls sitting before him. The seals on which he was sure he had seen somewhere before. Shrugging it off, he opted for positioning himself slightly further to his right in order for Itachi to see the screen better.

"Trust me Itachi, you don't want to miss this part." Sasori called from his seat on the floor as Sasuke finally stopped the two in the road.

~Live broadcast~

"Can I help you Uchiha?" Himitsu spat, as Sakura practically hissed the same thing.

"Beg pardon for interrupting the two of you. Tenshi-san, I came to apologize for earlier. And to inform you that Hikarikage-Hime-sama is on the roof of the next building over if you planned on looking for her." Sasuke started. In the distance you could hear '_**You are fucking dead Uchiha!**_' Before Gin's form could be seen hopping along roof tops towards the village gates.

"HIME-SAMA! WAIT FOR ME!" Himitsu screamed in glee, and chased after her.

Sasuke then turned to Sakura just in time to see her walking in the direction of her home.

"Sakura hold up a second.. can I talk to you?" he said once again blocking her path.

"No... I'm very busy, try stopping me on my day off." she retorted icily.

"Could you please just hear me out?" Sasuke muttered through gritted teeth, becoming frustrated with her for never listening to him while he was able to keep his head.

"Oh I heard you the last time. My physical ability to create a canyon with my bare hands, and my intellectual ability to create antidotes for unidentified poisons means I'm weak. Baring my heart and soul to someone I loved, and risking my life for him makes me a fangirl. And maintaining my virginity until such a time as I may be married makes me a whore. Did I leave anything out?" she asked sarcastically. When Sasuke just stared at her, she shook her head.

"I thought not. I'm leaving Sasuke." She said pushing past him, and walking on.

Immediately Gin appeared next to Sasuke, and punched him in the back of the head.

"She wants you to say something to stop her you imbecile! It doesn't need to sound pretty, but if she takes three more steps you lose!" she said, then disappeared again.

Everything went into slow motion for Sasuke, he knew he needed to speak up and say something, ANYTHING! Or he was done. ~one step further~ Possibly forever.

~two steps further away~ meanwhile Sakura was screaming in her head. _**'If I take one more step and you still don't come off your high horse, I'll murder you, dance on your grave, and date your best friend... second best friend, Naruto is married.'**_

~Three steps further...~ _**'Sasuke you idi...'**_

"Wait!"

Sasuke himself was surprised at how loud he'd said it. Sakura stopped in her tracks, and stayed where she was. Not even turning to face him.

"You did leave something out..." He said, pausing to see if she'd blow.

Elsewhere, Tsunade face-palmed.

"This doesn't bode well." She said in defeat. Hinata, and Kurenai nodding in agreement.

"What did I forget to mention, pray tell?" Sakura ground out.

"That I'm an idiot." Sasuke replied. She then turned to face him, shock evident on her face.

"Beg pardon?" she ask flustered, her bad mood melting into bewilderment.

"Yeah, I'm an idiot, cocky, inconsiderate, and can't control my temper. I have a bad habit of labeling people, and never look for the best in them like you do. And despite all of those faults, you chose to love me all those years ago. And because of those fault, I pushed you away, then ignored you. I also realize how arrogant, self-centered, and ignorant I am. Because when the tables turned, and I noticed you for who you really are. I couldn't take a taste of my own medicine which I know I more than deserved. And I should have respected that you needed your space, and needed time. Instead of trying to force you to see things my way." Sasuke paused to look into Sakura's eyes, but when he was met with a blank expression he lost his nerve, and couldn't speak clearly anymore. It was a miracle to him that he hadn't started yelling yet.

"I just wanted you to hear that from me, and to tell you that I sincerely apologize for the wrong things I've said and done that hurt you... ..I'm... gonna go now before I snap." He finished awkwardly and started heading in the other direction.

"Sasuke..." She trailed off. He stopped, but was too embarrassed to turn around.

"Yeah?" he asked, still awkwardly.

"I'm off on Sunday. Call me, and maybe we can hang out. Maybe, I don't know what errands I'll have to tend to this weekend yet.. so um... yeah just call me Saturday night.. nine-ish. Ja ne Sasuke-k...Sasuke!" She jerked slightly, and ran towards her home.

Sasuke was dumbstruck, but before she disappeared he snapped back to reality. "I will! I'll call Saturday!" he yelled after her.

"I'll be waiting!" she called back, and continued to run.

Later once gathered in the broadcast room again...

"_**FREEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOM!"**_ came the loud shout of joy from the currently happy dancing Gintsuki. However, her happiness was short live as Tsunade cleared her throat.

"Actually Gintsuki-san, The agreement was to coach Sasuke until they were _together_ then Itachi can go free." She explained. Upon hearing this Gintsuki slumped to the floor.

"_**FUCK YOU KARMA! YOU'RE IN CAHOOTS WITH CUPID! I KNOW IT! I'LL FIND YOU SOMEDAY AND YOU WILL DIE AT MY HANDS!**_

"Um.. okay, while she has a mental break down. Can anyone help me?I'm friggin _SHAKING!_" Sasuke interrupted the Kunoichi huddle, as he so chose to call it when they schemed.

"Alright bitch listen up, cuz this is what's gonna happen!" Everyone stared silently as Ino continued. "Sakura uses her Sunday's to do house hold shopping in the morning, and she makes house calls most of the afternoon. Or was it the other way around? Not important, anyway on the rare occasion she actually takes a Sunday off, as in for real off, then she usually sleeps in and joins up with her bestest friends for lunch. A.K.A, Me! However if she does take Sunday off I'll allow you to take this Sunday of mine." Here she paused to eat a cookie which magically materialized out of nowhere.

"Now then, what is more likely to happen is that Sakura will try to cancel hanging out with you on account of her errands. This is an excuse because she's afraid of what might happen if you two argue, and fight again. Granted you _Did_ manage to get some ground back tonight, but that's only until the brain she hides behind her giant forehead kicks into gear. And then she'll question spending time with you.

Getting back on topic, what you need to do is offer to assist with her errands. Try not to take no for an answer, but don't be forceful or arrogant about it or we're at square one again." Ino finished, whilst snacking on another cookie. "And square one means more barbies and fanfiction!" she added with her mouth full.

The following three days were spent rehearsing for the phone call which now loomed over Sasuke as a catastrophe waiting to happen. Gin would offer a snide comment here and there, but all around looked bored, and seemed completely irritated with the technicalities of the agreement.

Once Saturday had arrived Sasuke was highly nervous, this was apparent even to the Kunoichi that didn't know him well, such as Gin for example. They were still waiting on Tsunade that morning as Sasuke paced restlessly around the room. The camera watching his every movement in the event he snapped. (Lol, had to!)

Tsunade walked in, ruthlessly filling out several documents in her hands.

"Whatcha got there Tsunade?" Gin asked, enthusiastic about screaming Sasuke deaf for once.

"Absence leave documents for a mission of self accommodation... So basically allowing someone to leave the village for.."

"An extended period with out regulated check ins, and need to know permissions granted. I know, I have to fill those out from time to time." Gin finished for her.

"Yes, anyway I'll be taking care of these for awhile so Gintsuki I want you to take Sasuke out for today and make sure he's relaxed by time he gets back here to call Sakura." Tsunade ordered.

"_**WHAT!**_" Two shinobi yelled at the same time.

"Tsunade you can't be serious! Me go with _HIM_!" Gin shouted in disbelief.

"Although I hate it, I agree with her Tsunade-sama. You can't actually expect me to spend my entire Saturday with her, and relax." Sasuke said.

"Shithead's got a point Hokage." Gin piped in.

"I'm dead serious. Now get out or I call Sakura to the hospital for tomorrow." Tsunade said as she stamped two of the papers, and continued to fill out a third. "Oh and the camera crew goes with you." she added as an after thought. Groans from the two could be heard across Konoha.

"So... any ideas?" Sasuke tried for conversation.

"Trying to ignore the fact I'm stuck with a bastard for the entirety of my Saturday... _**Again!**_ So shut up, and let me ignore you." She retorted as she pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I'll take that as a 'no' then." Sasuke mumbled as the two, followed by several men with broadcasting equipment, continued walking down the street.

"Tsunade is evil." one pregnant woman said to a blond pregnant woman.

"Actually, it was Tenten's idea." the blond responded.

"_TENTEN!_" Hinata said in shock.

"Yeah, apparently she's got grudges against both of them, but no one knows what for. And she said this will make it all even." Ino explained.

"Holy shit dude." Temari, whom overheard them reacted to the information.

"Uchiha stop pacing! You're making me crazy!" Gin complained from where she sat under a tree.

"Can't stop, thinking..." the Uchiha mumbled.

"If you don't stop I'm going to deck you." Gin threatened. Sasuke only grunted in reply as he continued to pace, obviously no longer registering what she was saying to him.

"THAT'S IT!" She yelled leaping at him, poised to kill.

Reacting automatically, Sasuke side stepped grabbed her arm, and used her momentum to throw her behind him.

However being the badass kunoichi that she is, she didn't lose her balance for a second, and flipped around to throw shuriken at him. He dodged, and activated his Sharingan.

"shit just got real!" the camera man whispered to the assistant.

Meanwhile Sasuke had used the advanced speed granted to him by the Sharingan to appear behind Gin, and stab her in the kidney. Only to find a substitution. He looked around, and was barely able to block and counter the kick strategically aimed at his eyes. They carried on in this manner for roughly ten minutes. And either she knew how to counter the Sharingan, or she was as fast as a Sharingan wielder. Sasuke silently deducted as they fell into a harsh Taijutsu match.

"How!" Sasuke yelled while blocking another kick. "Do you know secrets about the Sharingan?! Or are you just fast?!" he demanded an explanation.

"I'm fast yeah..." She blocked a punch then spun around, and jabbed his knee. "...But when I attacked you the first time I threw a powder at y..." she back flipped away from his kick. "..At you to slow your movements. It doesn.." She ducked another kick, spun around and tripped Sasuke, then pinned him down, and held her fingers at his neck with deadly chakra emanating from her hand. "It doesn't last very long, ~pants~ that's why I was trying to block your vision. I knew you could read my moves. But ~pants some more~ you wouldn't be able to counter me the whole time cuz the relaxer I threw at you only lasts a few minutes." She finished explaining, then tried to catch her breath as she stood, and helped him to his feet.

Sasuke bent over with his hands on his knees, and tried to catch his breath as well.

"Well that certainly ~panting~ explains it.. Does that mean ~pants some more~ you weren't confidant you could beat me?" He asked as smugly as possibly while still panting. And they both stared walking as they carried on their conversation. Stopping at a vendor where Gintsuki got a few sodas.

"In a life or death matter you'd be dead right now asshole. But you activated your bloodline before I could come up with a carefully constructed strategy, so I merely gave you a handicap as I don't posses a kekei gen kai. And I still kicked your ass stupid." She replied while she fixed her hair.

"Whatever Princess..." He mumbled, and they headed back towards the broadcast room. Gintsuki downing another soda.

"Bastard you did _Not_ just call me Princess!"

"Sure as shit did." He answered smugly.

"It is so on Uchiha, bring it! Imma kick your ass!" She yelled, while flailing her arms energetically.

"How many cans of soda did you have again?" Sasuke asked, looking at her as if she were high.

"two..." she mumbles.

"BULLSHIT!" He called, knowing full well she could take just two.

"...plus fifteen..?" Gin admitted regretfully. They both laughed for awhile and then Sasuke stopped walking.

"Y'know Princess... You aren't so bad, maybe we should be friends." Sasuke offered.

"Y'know Uchiha... You are an ex-con that broke my good friend's heart twice, tried to kill her three times, and spent thirteen years of your life trying to kill the man I love, whom just so happens to be the _ONLY_ family you have. And family just so happens to be the _ONLY _thing I live to protect, so I'm gonna go with... no. Your sad excuse for a ninja's ass is never going to be my friend. I'm only being nice-ish now because I'm on a sugar high. Something I'm never allowed to indulge in on Isle Igen. So kiss my ass muthafukka!" Gin finished her rant with an unforeseen punch in the side of his head, then they both walked into the broadcast room where Gin collapsed on the couch and Sasuke sat at a desk where the phone was located, and prepared to dial Sakura's number.

"Before he makes that call. Tenten, when this is all over watch your back. Cuz I'm making your ass priority one amongst Hikarikage. And also... Sasuke if you fuck this up. I'm going home to Isle Igen. So no pressure!" She told him with a sickeningly sweet smile, before lying back down on the couch and throwing an arm over her eyes. A headache from the sugar overdose crashing on her brain like an ambush in war.

"The hell is wrong with her?" Temari asked.

"She drank seventeen sodas while we were out." Sasuke explained.

"I don't see how that would effect her so badl..."

"In the two hours it took us to get back here." he cut her off.

"Oh" was the response which echoed throughout the room.

"Okay Uchiha, dial up!" Ino announced, throwing the phone at his head.

~Back with the Akatsuki at Itachi's _**'cell'**_~

"Hey Itachi, are you going to put these maps away and watch this, or is it more important than Sasuke getting whipped?" Deidara said peering over Itachi's shoulder. Itachi skillfully shielded the maps from Deidara, and continued in his calculations.

"The hell are you doing anyway?" Sasori asked. Itachi gave him a stare, as if to say. _'Really Sasori? I've been working at this for six days and you still haven't caught on?! You amaze me.'_

Sasori glanced at the cluttered desks, and when his gaze lit upon three sealed scrolls sitting on the shelf, he immediately understood.

"Well shit! If I'd known you were trying for that I'd have kicked this idiot out days ago. Come on Deidara, we're going to see Vai and Tora. We'll watch with them at the hotel." Sasori announced, grabbing Deidara by the collar, and dragging him out of the room.

"But Danna! That Tora bitch cut my hair the last time I saw her! It took a year to grow it back!"

"Too bad, you're coming with me. I'll tell you what Itachi's doing if you do." Sasori bribed. Deidara contemplated for awhile, then conceded with a nod.

"But keep that Tora brat awa..." Itachi didn't hear Deidara finish as Kisame had already shut the door.

"So you gonna watch this, work, or both?" Kisame asked resuming his seat on the couch.

"I can see it fine from here, just as long as you do not maneuver any further to your left." Itachi replied once more, still completely engrossed in his work.

"Suit yourself." Kisame then moved to the far right side of the couch, and turned the volume up on the tv so as to ensure Itachi didn't miss anything.

~broadcast room~making the call~

Sasuke had been forced to make the call on speaker so that everyone could hear, and therefore assist if need be. The phone rang three time before Sakura's voice came out loud and clear over the speaker.

This is how the conversation went..

"_Kon'ichiwa!"_ she answered.

"Sakura... its Sasuke."

"_Sasuke-kun! Oh I forgot you were calling tonight. Gomen!"_

"It's no problem... um.. so will you be very busy tomorrow?"

"_Gomen again Sasuke-kun, but I am. I have house calls to make in the morning, and all my errands to run after that. And I need to go to the market... perhaps next week?"_

"Um... I see.. Actually I have an idea. If its alright with you Sakura, could I help you tomorrow? I would have nothing to do but stay home all day anyway."

"_You would do that? It might get annoying though."_

"I don't mind, helping you tomorrow sounds like more fun than cleaning my house. It doesn't need cleaned badly anyway."

"_Well if you're sure Sasuke-kun, than you can pick me up at my house at 7am tomorrow. If I'm not there than I already went to Ino's and you can meet me there. Is that alright?"_

"Sounds like a plan. Want me to bring coffee or something?"

"_Some caffeinated tea maybe? That would be perfect! Thanks Sasuke-kun. I'll see you in the morning!"_

"Alright see you, good night Sakura."

"_Night!"_

~Dial tone~

As soon as Sasuke turned the phone off the room burst into yells of joy. Ino's loud "SUCCESS!" could be heard throughout all the surrounding buildings!

After they all calmed down, Tsunade cleared her throat for everyone's attention.

"Alright, as tomorrow is to be the first day they spend together, than they will only need one person to watch them..."

"I'M NOT GONNA DO IT!" Gin screamed. Tsunade sent her a glare.

"As I was saying, I think Hanabi should do this as she's least likely to be found out. Will you Hanabi?" Tsunade asked.

"Hai, Tsunade-sama."

"Good, everyone else can relax and do as they please tomorrow. Except Ino whom is going to be a maternity leave starting immediately, you may not leave your house for anything without Sai, unless it's to attend Doctor's appointments. Understood!"

"Hai, Tsunade-sama..." Was Ino's sullen reply.

"Alright, the final matter is Sasuke. If tomorrow goes well for the two of you, then you are to ask Sakura on a proper date. Only after a _second_ Date is assured will the agreement be held up on Gintsuki's end, and I shall honor my end. Understood Sasuke and Gintsuki?" she asked,

"Yeah." Gin said very sarcastically.

"Hai." Sasuke replied at the same time.

"Good, I'll see you all at Ino's on Monday morning to hear from Hanabi and Sasuke how things went. Good night everyone."

After everyone finished their goodbyes they set of on their separate ways home.

Gintsuki walked slowly in the opposite direction of her hotel. Sasuke noticed this, and decided to follow her. He was both amazed, and yet still unsurprised to find that she went to the maximum security prison. Spearheaded by Morino Ibiki, and The Hokage herself. This prison only housed one 'criminal' and he was in a 'cell' on the top floor. Uchiha Itachi. The guard at the door Sasuke didn't recognize. He was tall, with disheveled brown hair and his eye were mismatched. One eye appeared to be dead, but he wore ANBU clothes so Sasuke assumed he was a good guard. He stayed far enough back that the two wouldn't notice him, and shifting some chakra to his ears to enhance his hearing, he eavesdropped on their conversation.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but no visitors. I tell you this everyday." The guard told her, somewhat annoyed, but mostly he sounded apologetic.

"I know. But can't you please ask Ibiki one time? Tell him it's Hikarikage-Hime, first born of the hidden clan." She sounded... well actually desperate...ish... there was a sense of almost loss in her voice Sasuke had never heard before.

The guard sighed, and picked up his walky talky from his belt.

"Headquarters... this is guard Sudo at the level zero prison front gate. I need Morino on the channel." He said into the speaker.

"_This is Morino."_ came the reply.

"Yeah, sorry sir. Hikarikage-Hime, first born of the hidden clan is standing at the front gate with me here. She has a request." The guard, Sudo explained.

"_What's the request?"_ Ibiki asked the guard. Even over the device Sasuke could tell that Ibiki was calculating.

"She wants to see Uchiha sir." Sudo replied hesitantly.

"_Out of the question. No one sees the Uchiha. No visitors is part of his punishment. Besides, if her plan works he'll be freed in a few weeks anyway. Tell her to go away."_ Morino yelled over the speaker. Sasuke thought he was being very harsh toward Gintsuki, but then again, he didn't particularly like her all that much. And she hated him.

The guard looked apologetic again, as he spoke.

"I'm sorry your highness. But I'm gonna have to ask you to leave." She looked past him to the top floor of the prison. Sasuke looked as well, and he could see Itachi standing in the window. Oddly, Sasuke hadn't noticed the window before. Itachi raised his hand in a half wave to Gintsuki. She smirked cockily at him, and gave him the peace sign. Itachi then let the curtains fall and Sasuke saw why he hadn't noticed the window before. The drapes looked like brick. The irony!

Sasuke then looked back at Gintsuki, and saw her walking in the direction of her hotel. He couldn't be certain... but he thought maybe she was crying..

That is until he turned around and came face to kunai with Gintsuki herself, and she most definitely had not been crying.

"Spying on me asshole?" she seethed.

"I was concerned." Sasuke replied. She appeared shocked by this statement, and lowered her kunai.

"Well you have no need to be. We aren't friends. You should be more concerned with getting enough sleep tonight to help Sakura with her running around tomorrow!" And with that Gintsuki walked away. And Sasuke headed home as well.

_**TBC...**_

A/N: I'm only writing one more chapter for this one, then its finished. I've lost all my energy for Sasuke bashing in this one, and truth be told, I have also run out of ways to embarrass him, and out of things he needed coaching in. So in the next Chapter Itachi's actions will be revealed, and and Sasuke will end up with Sakura. And Almost everyone will be happy. Sai is still an insensitive prick, and Ino still has mood swings, so you can't expect EVERYONE to be happy. LMAO!


	7. A Deal is a Deal

_**Chapter 7~**_

_**A Deal is a Deal...**_

_Disclaimer:_ I do NOT own Naruto, the show, the series, the manga, the characters, NOTHING! I am increasingly pissed off with Kishimoto however, (the actual owner of Naruto) for all of the best characters dying. AND I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN KISHIMOTO! YOU HEAR ME! I WILL _HUNT! __YOU!__**DOWN!**_

Okay, now that, that's out... on with it!

"Tsunade-sama, this is Hyuuga Hanabi, do you read?" Hanabi said quietly into her mic.

"Yes I read you Hanabi.. just keep an eye on those two." Tsunade's voice came through the ear piece.

"Hai! Tsunade-sama." she replied, then stalked the individuals in question.

Sasuke had walked to Sakura's house that morning to find she had already left. He then set out towards Ino and Sai's small house to find her.

When he arrived she was in the middle of a chatting with Ino, he could plainly see through the front window. He suspected Ino had chosen to sit there with the intention that he would see them. None the less he rang the door bell.

"Sai will you get the door please?" Ino called. A moment later Sai had invited Sasuke inside. After informing Sai that Sakura was expecting him, he was lead into the front room where the two women were still chatting animatedly.

"Ohaiyo." Sasuke greeted the two.

"Ohaiyo Uchiha." Ino said flatly.

"O-ohaiyo... Sasuke." Sakura seemed a little nervous to answer, but Sasuke was okay with that. "I guess we'll be off then Ino. Remember tomorrow at noon. And Sai has to come with you, whilst he's conscious!" Sakura said sternly.

"Hai, Hai... you two have fun one your date." Ino teased.

"INO!" Sakura squeaked, but didn't deny it.

"I expect details tomorrow girl. No way would I be late with the promise of gossip." with that Ino pushed the couple out of her house, and slammed the door. Evil cackling ensued shortly thereafter.

"So... um... what are we doing today Sakura?" Sasuke asked uncertainly.

"Oh..um, ano... First I have some patients to see. This way." she explained grabbing his hand and tugging him in the correct direction. Sasuke was slightly shocked she had grabbed his hand, but then slightly let down when she dropped it shortly after they had started walking.

As it turned out, Sakura actually had six house calls to make that morning, and by time she had finished it was noon. Sasuke wasn't sure how much help he had actually been to Sakura herself. But the house calls were made to people with injuries, and they hadn't been able to take care of several different chores around the houses. So while Sakura tended to them, Sasuke had assisted the family members in the morning chores. He wasn't sure if Sakura knew how he'd occupied his time during the house calls. But she had yet to comment on it, so he was hoping she hadn't realized.

"You want to get lunch Sasuke? I don't have any house calls for the rest of the day. And my errands can be run after we eat." Sakura offered, gesturing in the direction of a small cafe. Sasuke agreed, and they walked inside.

Almost immediately Sasuke noticed Gintsuki sitting at a table in the farthest back corner. But she seemed busy with several papers, so he ignored her presence.

They were seated by a window, and Sakura ordered a sandwich with a side salad, and a small Sunday.

Sasuke likewise ordered a sandwich and salad, but with coffee. Silence fell upon them as they waited for their orders.

"You know Sasuke... you've really changed.." Sakura said randomly pushing the cherry of her Sunday back and forth with her spoon. Sasuke finished chewing his salad before answering.

"How so?" He asked curious.

"Well for example, your apology the other night. That was seriously out there." She said smiling, Sasuke looked away embarrassed.

"It was spur of the moment... I seriously was just spitting out everything that popped into my head out of desperation." He mumbled an explanation. Sakura smiled again.

"And the honesty... The honesty is different. But welcome. And finally you're a lot kinder toward the general public. Don't think I didn't know what you were doing all morning, I normally help the families with the chores after tending to my patients. I'm really proud of you Sasuke." She finished by scooping up her cherry and eating it. They both stood to leave, and Sakura leaned in real close to his ear to whisper. "I'm also proud of you for asking for help from my friends, whom all wanted you dead." she stepped back to take in his shocked appearance, "I never would have had the guts to do that." she teased him, laughing hysterically.

"Why you little!" He said reaching for her, she dodged but accidentally bumped another customer.

"AH! Gomen... Gintsuki-sama!" she freaked when she realized whom she'd just caused to drop their beverage.

"No worries Sakura. I wasn't paying attention either. I'll just get another one." Gintsuki said waving it off.

"No please, let me." Sasuke interrupted. "I was just about to pay for our lunch anyway. I'll get you another soda." He offered, leaving Sakura and Gintsuki to halfheartedly argue over whose fault it was.

"So let's agree its Sasuke's fault, cuz he made me dodge him like that." Sakura laughed, as Sasuke walked back over with a soda in hand.

"That is unfair on a number of levels." He said annoyed, but a smirk still on his face.

"So Gintsuki-sama, where are you off to?" Sakura asked as the three of them exited the cafe.

"The maximum security penitentiary." She replied seriously, causing Sasuke to choke and Sakura to stand there awkwardly.

"Oh... um you know they don't allow visitors right?" Sakura ventured to ask.

"I'm aware.. It's the thought that counts though." Gintsuki said as she started walking away. Once sure she was out of ear shot, Sakura turned her worried expression to Sasuke.

"This is bad Sasuke-kun. I have orders to do a check up on your brother today. And its a scheduled appointment. I can't let Gintsuki-sama know, she'll be furious!" Sakura explained.

Sasuke paled at the thought. They had to think of something.

Several failed attempts at coming up with an idea later, had Sasuke and Sakura standing a safe distance away from the gate while they watched Gintsuki speak in sign language at the guard, whom obviously didn't know what the hell any of it meant.

"Sasuke-kun, can you copy the signs she's making? I think she's just making the same series of signs over and over..?" Sakura whispered after watching Gintsuki for several minutes. Sasuke nodded and activated his Sharingan in order to copy her hand movements. After Sasuke showed Sakura the signs she looked them up in one of her books she had with her. (A/N: Coincidences like these can happen!)

"She's telling him.. 'Doctor's appointment today'...? why do you think she's telling the guard that Sasuke-kun?" Before Sasuke could answer, Gintsuki was beside them.

"I wasn't telling the guard.. The guard knows, but thinks I don't. Say Sakura, cuz you have to go in, could you give Itachi a letter for me?" Gintsuki asked. Sakura stared back at her in disbelief.

"Ano... I'm not sure. I could ask permission..?" Sakura offered, knowing that such a thing was forbidden.

"Don't worry about it. They wont let you. I'll see you later." Gintsuki responded, then left immediately.

Sasuke walked Sakura to the gate, and let her know that he'd wait there.

~Inside the 'prison cell'~

"Kon'bonwa Sensei. How is your day going?" Itachi asked once Sakura entered the bare room, which consisted of a flat bed, a desk and chair, and an adjoining bathroom. There was also a torn curtain hanging in the corner as a make shift changing area. (A/N: Sensei is used to address Doctors as well as teachers.)

"Hello Uchiha-san... I thought they were getting better furnishings for you?" Sakura asked, slightly confused.

"Some more pressing matters came up I suppose."

~In the adjoining bathroom.~

"I can't believe he actually hides all of that stuff in a scroll!" Kisame whispered to Pein,

"I can't believe Gintsuki-sama sent him an alert via chakra spike, then spoke to him in sign language." Pein replied.

"Yeah that was creepy too." Kisame stated, they both nodded.

~ back in the cell~

"Sensei there is something in your hair." Itachi stated, quickly grabbing a folded piece of paper, and disguising it with Genjutsu to look like a leaf.

"Oh, thank you Uchiha-san. That must have gotten stuck there when I walked under the trees in front of the building." Sakura explained when she saw the leaf.

The check up went like any normal routine check up would. Although the first chance Itachi had where Sakura turned her back, he opened Gintsuki's note, which read..

_'Sorry for the short notice!'_

This brought a small smile to his face, which he was sure to keep hidden from the two Akatsuki members currently hiding in his bathroom. He then tucked the paper into his pocket, and turned his attention back to Sakura, whom was picking up her bag to leave.

"Sensei could you do me a favor?" Itachi asked as she knocked on the door for the guard to let her out.

"Depends... what?" she asked nicely.

"Could you please tell Hikarikage-hime-sama that I said 'Thank you. It was very appreciated.' Please tell her this for me?" Sakura looked at him as though she somewhat understood, then nodded and left the building.

She found Sasuke at the gate, and they walked to the market to do her shopping. Once there they happened upon Gintsuki once more. "Sasuke I have to tell Hikarikage-hime-sama something." Sakura told him, grabbing his hand again, and dragging him over to Gintsuki.

"You two again? Shouldn't you be out enjoying your date Sakura?" Gintsuki said while smirking evilly at Sasuke, whom looked away irritated but trying to keep his head cool.

"Yes... I mean its not a date.. I mean.. er... I'm not sure what I mean anymore. Anyway, we'll stop bothering you after this, Uchiha-san gave me a message for you." Sakura explained after stuttering several times.

"Can't he tell me himself, he's standing with you right now?" Gintsuki asked confused beyond belief.

"No, no, no... Uchiha Itachi-san... I think it was in response to you warning him of the check up today." Sakura explained again.

"You speak sign language? Huh.. I'll have to be more careful. What's the message?" She asked.

"He said to tell you 'Thank you, it was very appreciated.'" Sakura relayed the message, and Gintsuki mumbled something unintelligible, before thanking her and walking away. "Sasuke-kun I think she's in love with your brother." Sakura said sarcastically, teasing him lightly as he had been silent since Gintsuki was there.

"Ya'think?" he joked back, and they laughed and continued talking while Sakura grabbed everything she needed from the market. Sasuke tried to pay for her stuff, but she argued it was for her house there was no need for that.. They lightly argued about it until Sakura agreed to let him cover half, as her pay wasn't until this coming weekend. "I'll pay you back I swear Sasuke-kun." Sakura whined as they walked back to her house.

"There's no need for that honest.. I wanted to pay for it." Sasuke replied. He was carrying her groceries, and she opened the door to her house inviting him in. They put everything away, and once finished Sasuke and Sakura found themselves in an awkward silence. He mumbled something about heading home, and made for the door but Sakura stopped him.

"Sasuke-kun... would you like to stay for dinner?" Sakura asked. Sasuke was both speechless, and ecstatic. So he nodded his affirmation.

Once in the kitchen they took about twenty minutes before agreeing on what they would have for dinner, and Sakura sent Sasuke to the kitchen closet to grab an apron for her while she got all the necessities out of the fridge and cupboards. When Sasuke came back holding a pink apron, but _wearing_ a white one... Sakura didn't know whether to be shocked or to laugh hysterically. Her body forced the latter though, leaving Sasuke standing, and staring at Sakura whom was on the floor holding her ribs. "Okay... ~giggling~ I'm good now." She chuckled a bit more before grabbing the counter and standing herself up. "the fact you cook didn't surprise me Sasuke-kun, just the apron did." She explained, a few more silent giggles causing her shoulders to shake while she held a hand over her mouth to cover her grin. Sasuke smirked back at her, then turned from side to side pretending to inspect the apron tied around his own waist.

"I don't know... I think it suits me Sakura." He said amused, shooting her another smirk. This caused her to fall into another fit of giggles. Only this time she didn't literally fall to the floor, however she was still laughing hard enough to need to hold her aching ribs.

As they cooked dinner they teased each other back and forth... after a comment Sakura made about Sasuke's most memorable fashion disaster, A.K.A the Ass bow, Sasuke flicked some sauce off his hand at her. The sauce landed on her nose making both of them laugh but also causing Sasuke to let his guard down enough for Sakura to toss doe in Sasuke's hair.

The food fight ended when there was more food on them than they'd made to eat. So after dinner they cleaned Sakura's kitchen, then Sasuke washed the food out of his hair in her kitchen sink, while Sakura washed her hair upstairs.

After that they sat in her living room recollecting the entire day. Once finished Sasuke decided it was the perfect time to further try his luck, but also decided to do so strategically. "So... you mentioned earlier today that you saw the broadcast... how much of it did you see?" he asked tentatively.

"Oh all of it." Sakura smiled evilly, and Sasuke paled. "By the way Sasuke-kun... Does this skirt make my butt look big?" She asked, turning around to give him a full view of her rear end, and still grinning like that Cheshire cat.

"NO!" he freaked, replying instinctively, and jumping backward onto his feet in disbelief. Sakura chuckled diabolically.

"Are you still staring at my ass you pervert?" She asked in mock horror.. though Sasuke was still too shocked to realize.

"NO!" he said again diverting his vision towards the window over her shoulder.

"Shame, shame Sasuke-kun, you shouldn't lie. Go into the next room and commence the barbie marathon!" She yelled evilly, perfectly mimicking Gintsuki's voice and pointing at the door to the next room whilst standing on one foot and her grin getting wider... if that is even possible.

"Kami Sakura that is SO not funny." Sasuke said falling to a sitting position on the floor while Sakura laughed at him. As she continued to laugh Sasuke eventually got over his slight breakdown and started laughing with her. Once they'd calmed down he picked up where he left off. "Anyway... Besides that.. there is something else I wanted to ask you tonight." he explained.

"Hmm?" Sakura asked, still not trusting herself to keep from laughing if she spoke.

"I was wondering Sakura... if you're free this weekend, would you like to go out? On a proper date..with me?" He'd ended up mumbling the question, and he wasn't sure if she'd even heard him, but he still looked away in embarrassment. So unseen by Sasuke, Sakura's Cheshire grin turned into a full blown smile of joy.

"Actually with Ino on house arrest now, My three week vacation starts tomorrow. If you're still on mandatory leave the next three weeks.. you're welcome to come with me." Sakura replied. Sasuke's head shot up and he stared at her in amazement.

"Really?" he wanted to make sure. She nodded.

"But..." she grinned evilly again. "You have to help me shop for clothes." she added the catch.

"Thank Kami they covered this in training!" Sasuke exaggerated theatrically.

~The following morning at Ino's~

"_**SHE INVITED YOU TO WHAT!**_" Ten Kunoichi screamed. (Hanabi knew so she wasn't yelling, But counting the other 8 Konoha women plus Vaira and Ginni makes ten.)

"I said she invited me to spend her three week vacation with her when I asked her on a second date. I'll let Hyuuga Hanabi explain from here as I have to meet Sakura to go shopping in twenty minutes. Good day." And with that Sasuke left.

All eyes on the youngest Hyuuga she spent the next two hours giving her verbal report of yesterday. The only parts she couldn't account for was when Sakura went into the prison, and for two minutes she'd lost them in the Market.

"I can account for that. Sakura had something to discuss with me and when you lost sight of them was about the time she'd dragged Sasuke over to talk to me. So yeah... they were fine then too." Gintsuki filled in.

"Discuss what?" Tsunade asked suspicious of Gintsuki, she _Had_ been at the prison after all.

"Asked me what I was signing to the guard. I honestly have no idea... I figured 'new guard... let's screw with his head.' So I did. Don't know what I was signing, but then again, neither did the guard." Gintsuki chuckled evilly.

"You're really weird Gintsuki-sama..." Hanabi said before continuing her report. She told them of how Sakura invited Sasuke in.. the aprons.. the food fight.. then Sakura making fun of Sasuke's 'lessons' so to speak. Eventually finishing with the legitimate date proposal, and Sakura's invite to spend vacation together.

"Holy cow I thought Sakura hadn't watched the broadcast." Temari said amazed.

"Once word reached her that Sasuke had sought our help, and the broadcast was created to humiliate him to all hell... she probably couldn't battle her curiosity." Ino explained.

"And I wonder who told her that it was about Uchiha's humiliation? That wasn't public knowledge until after the first viewing!" Gintsuki said standing all up in Ino's face.

"Ehehehehe... what can I say... prego slip of the tongue...? hehe.." Ino said feigning innocents.

"Not buying it Preggers." Tenten said glaring at her, then she laughed. "If she watched everything, then Sakura watched Gintsuki-sama kick Sasuke's ass in a spar!" With this realization the entire household burst into laughter. Which was quickly interrupted by an ANBU bringing Tsunade some papers.

"Tsunade-sama, I was ordered to bring these to you at exactly noon." the guard explained. Tsunade took the papers and dismissed him. She then took a pen out of Ino's hair causing the long blond strands to fall everywhere.

"HEY!" Ino protested.

"You'll get over it." Was all Tsunade said as she speedily signed every form, and stamped them all as well. Where she got the stamp I'm sure I don't know, but she had it. She then turned to the last two pages and handed the papers to Gintsuki. "Hikarikage-hime-sama, would you please put your signature and seal on these documented release, and reinstatement papers.. As well as one document for personal travel of urgency." Everyone's jaws dropped at the fact that Tsunade had already sent the papers in the matter of Itachi's freedom to all the other Ninja villages AND had them ready for final signature by Hikarikage's chieftain. Then a realization came to Tenten (Of all people!).

"I thought Uchiha-san's documents needed to be signed by the Leader of Isle Igen? Like the King, and/or Queen...or something." Tenten questioned. Half the room face-palmed, and Kurenai poked Tenten in the shoulder a few times to get her undivided attention.

"Tenten... Hikarikage-hime-sama, in actuality is Hikarikage-Joo-sama." Kurenai explained. With this new found knowledge Tenten suddenly went white at the memory of sticking Gintsuki with Sasuke all day two days ago, and with it Gintsuki's threat.

"I'm suddenly not feeling so well... I'm going home to tell Neji that everything was successful... Good day everyone... Hikarikage-sama." And with a quick bow to the room of Kunoichi, Tenten got the fuck outta dodge.

When the party at Ino's was finished with. Gintsuki took the documents and walked to the prison. To say she was nervous was an understatement, as she walked into countless pedestrians, four walls, two store signs, five light poles, and a fence... nervous could have been the understatement of the universe when Gintsuki discovered three miles belatedly that she had passed the alley she was supposed to have turned down in order to get the maximum security prison. When she finally arrived around six that evening it was Ibiki whom opened the door for her, and then left her standing outside Itachi's holding cell. "I know it may not mean much coming from me Princess... but Arigato for everything you've done for our village's hero." Ibiki said.. didn't sound any different from when he was delivering a speech a the Chunin exams... but genuine.

"Your village... those of whom are as thankful as you, are all welcome Morino." she replied, still too nervous to care if she sounded unprofessional.

"I'll leave you then. Excuse me." after he was gone, Gintsuki tightened her grip on the vanilla colored envelope, then turned the handle and walked into the holding cell. What she found was highly unexpected however. The room was still decked out like a penthouse, yes. But before her eyes she beheld Kisame nervously pacing in front of the couch, which was occupied by Hidan, Deidara, and Sasori. Kakuzu was standing in the dark far right corner of the room, looking more Emo then Sasuke could ever achieve. And in the left corner of the room sitting at Itachi's desk was Pein, Konan standing at his right shoulder resting her hand upon it. When she stepped into the room everyone broke out of there dazed state ('Cept Kakuzu, he wasn't in a dazed state, he's in an 'I don't give a damn' state).

Kisame stopped pacing looking straight at Gintsuki and gaping like... well a fish, I didn't think that one through..XP.

Sasori suddenly looked very nervous and looked anywhere but at Gintsuki. Deidara was doing much the same as Sasori, and Hidan threw himself behind the couch to hide. Konan's hand dropped to her side, and she wouldn't meet Gintsuki's questioning eyes. Seeing she had to be the first to speak, Ginni put on her signature cocky smirk she often used in these types of situations, and looked at Pein where he still sat at Itachi's desk.

"What no Itachi? And I had a present for him too. Will you see that he gets this Pein?" Gintsuki said as she began walking towards the desk. Pein got up and met her half way, as she made to hand him the documents he reached into one of his inner pockets and pulled out a small white envelope, her name written on it in Itachi's script.

After handing off the document to Pein her hand fell to her side, unable to reach for the letter. Pein handed the documents to Sasori, whom took Deidara and Kisame, then left.

"Itachi wished for me to inform you that he has left the Akatsuki. We are all sworn to never contact him unless our business is of the utmost priority to the people with which his loyalty now lye. He also entrusted me with this letter for you, as he suspected anyone else here, Konan included, may have read it. For you Joo-sama." Pein explained, then held the letter out to her. Gintsuki slowly grasped the letter and stared at the envelope. "Goodnight Joo-sama" Pein bowed then walked to the door and stood as the other members filed before her and each bowed with the same response of 'Goodnight Joo-sama' after they all left Pein walked out, and closed the door behind him, Leaving Gintsuki alone staring at the envelope.

_ **The**** End...**_

A/N) Alright here it is, the LAST chapter. I hope you liked it, because until the ending with the Akatsuki, I had Zero motivation for it... So excuse me please if it sucked. Anyway I'm sure those of you that couldn't figure it out on your own, want to know... But "Joo" pronounced with a soft 'J' similarly to if you were french. And the 'oo' is just a long 'O' pronounced twice. This is the Japanese word for, Queen...or... so my translator says... anyway there's going to be an epilogue to explain what you don't get... so just hang tight please.

I only didn't read the letter in the chapter because the alternate personalty I have whom is in charge of these types of things, hasn't figured out what the letter from Itachi is going to say. So when she knows, I'll know, and I'll put it in the Epilogue so YOU can know.

**_HIGHLY__ IMPORTANT!_** need to know for the Epilogue. Hikarikage is my sure-name as well as my siblings (except Vaira cuz she married Sasori).

Our father haled from a powerful clan known as the Hikari-Igen. And married our mother out of love, also stopping a war with her clan known as the Kingusu-kage. Then was born my generation of the Hikarikage. Our Peoples' emblem of Igen was not changed, but new ones were made for my siblengs and anyone that will marry into our family. I hope this helps with any questions you'll have when you read the Epilogue.


	8. Epilogue

_**Epilogue**_

Sasori's P.O.V.

I have a story for you, faithful readers of Gintsuki-sama's. It is a look into Hikarikage History.. and It starts with an ancestor of Gintsuki's father's...

Her name was Yuuki-hime... Princess of the Hikari-Igen line. And she was in love with a non-noble shinobi from a village the Histories have left unnamed. When her father saw her feelings for the peasant he became enraged and ordered that Yuuki-hime was not to leave Isle Igen until such a time as he found a husband for her, a husband of noble birth.

It was on his way home from one of many failed searches that the king happened upon the peasant his daughter so loved, whilst he was training. The King saw the young man's determination and in a moment of familiarity and weakness said the man might marry his daughter if he could prove his worth before the king. Then the king continued on his way to Isle Igen.

Once home in his throne room the king realized what he had done, and regretted the discussion he'd had with the peasant. So in order to undo his mistake he stayed at the palace and would never give the young shinobi his chance to prove himself before the king. He thought because his palace has on the hidden Isle of his forefathers' that the boy would give up marrying his daughter and he could live peacefully.

Word of the king's treachery reached the young man however, and he was furious with the false hope the king had given him. The young Shinobi was determined to prove himself worthy of Yuuki-hime though, and also determined to spite the deceitful king. So he set out studying charts and maps of all kinds. And studied ancient road ways and even tried to infiltrate Hikari-Igen missions in order to find the mysterious Isle Yuuki-hime was hidden away on. He searched the world for three long years trying to discover where she was hidden, and on the day that marked the start of the fourth year he'd found what he believed was Isle Igen. He didn't try to conceal himself knowing he would be killed if he did. Instead he tricked the gate guards into allowing him entrance by showing them the necklace Yuuki-hime had given him years before. The guards soon discovered their mistake however, and sounded the alarm. The young man evaded as best he could while following the king's chakra signature to the thrown room. He made it to the thrown room and burst through the doors only to find himself surrounded.

He was brought to his knees before the royal family, and he expected execution until he looked into the joyous yet tear filled eyes of Yuuki-hime.

The shinobi raised his head defiantly and asked the King if he had yet proved himself worthy of the Princess' hand. The king was enraged by his insolence and was about to give the order for the man's execution when the former queen, the king's mother, spoke up instead.

She recognized the young man to be courageous, strong, and incredibly intellectual in order to have located the Ninja Island of the Hikari. She had the young man placed in a guest room while she discussed his fate with the royal family.

Three weeks later he was desperate to see Yuuki-hime and about to brake down his door to get to her, when the Old Queen entered, the current Queen standing at her left.

She explained to the young man that the wedding ceremony would take place that evening, and that he was not only to be the next head of the Royal family, but also through his deeds he had made history.

From that day on, the condition for any Man not born into the Hikari clan, if they so wished to marry a daughter of the royal Hikari-Igen blood line, they were told they must first find the hidden Isle Igen.

"It was this custom which made my marriage to Vaioretogetsu-hime possible, and we have been happily married for five years now."

"We could have been happily married for eight years right now if you had just eloped with me." Vaira cut in snidely.

"I wanted to marry you properly, and without your clan seeking my head on a platter. Besides, I was the fourth man in all of recorded history to have found the Isle." I replied trying to save my ego.

"Yeah yeah.. now come on, Tsuki-chan needs a drink. So you have to sit in the counsel meeting for her, and take notes." Vaira said pulling me to my feet, out our door, and toward the Igen Counsel building.

Gintsuki had been upset for the last six months since her return from Konoha after successfully freeing Uchiha Itachi from his life sentence in prison. However he had already left on a personal mission when she arrived with his documents. He left the responsibility on the entirety of Akatsuki to receive her when she brought the documents. And he also left a letter for Gintsuki, which he entrusted to Pein before Itachi retired from the Akatsuki Organization. The note did not tell the Queen the details of his personal mission. As a matter of fact I alone knew the details. I had told Deidara some made up bull in order to keep him from pestering me. With the knowledge of his mission, Itachi also entrusted to me the three Igen scrolls he had stolen. Probably because I'm part of the clan now so it wouldn't seem weird if I recovered some stolen scrolls.

Now that I think back to that day, I'd never seen Gintsuki pretend so horribly in my life as the day of Itachi's release.

~Six months ago at the Konoha Maximum security prison~

Normal P.O.V.

When she stepped into the room everyone broke out of there dazed state.

Kisame stopped pacing and was gaping at Gintsuki.

Sasori was very nervous and looked anywhere but at her. Deidara was doing much the same as Sasori, and Hidan threw himself behind the couch to hide. Konan's hand dropped to her side, and she wouldn't meet her eyes.

Gintsuki was the first to speak, putting on a cocky smirk she often used in these types of situations, and looking at Pein where he still sat at Itachi's desk. "What no Itachi? And I had a present for him too. Will you see that he gets this Pein?"

Gintsuki said evenly. Though Sasori could see sadness in her eyes, and heard where her voice hitched twice. He could also make out several bruises starting to form on her forehead. He wondered as Pein handed him the documents, if Gintsuki-sama had been banging her had against a wall to make her nerves go away. After collecting Kisame and Deidara to help him locate Itachi they set out to deliver his documents to him. A short while later Pein, Konan, Hidan, and Kakuzu were all headed for the hideout, which left Gintsuki alone in the cell with her letter.

Now she was normally a calm woman when it came to matters such as these. But for four hours she sat at Itachi's desk staring at the envelope which contained the letter he had written her. It could be a simple 'thank you'. Which was most likely considering it was Itachi, and she knew he didn't return her feelings. Hell he never lead her on, or gave her reason to believe otherwise, so that purged all fantasies of it being a love letter. Itachi didn't seem to be the 'love letter' type anyway.

But then there was also the fact he had entrusted the letter to Pein for safe keeping, such means could only bring to light the fact it was deathly important that no one else read the letter. But then again knowing Itachi's... unique sense of humor, he could have entrusted the letter to Pein only to make Deidara and Hidan suffer wanting to know what it said... which in reality was probably just a mere 'thank you.'

_'Yeah... that's probably exactly what it is.'_ Gintsuki thought as she finally reached for the letter.

_** Tsuki-hime,**_

_**Forgive me please for not being here to receive you when you delivered my reinstatement documents, but the matters to which I am currently attending are priority, and my hope is that if I am correct I should be finished in a month or two with my current priority and then I will express my gratitude to you in person if you will permit me.**_

_**I cannot begin to express my gratitude with mere words alone, but in this letter for you I will try. For my freedom, Shinobi status, and my Otouto's happiness in his recently renewed relationship with Haruno Sakura, I thank you with all my heart. Your actions and deeds will be held in my memory as well as in my heart for eternity. And for these actions and amazing deeds I will be grateful for all eternity.**_

_**My current matter of urgency requires that I stop here dearest Tsuki-hime, again I beg your forgiveness. I will entrust this letter to Pein. And if I am as good a judge of character that I hope, then it should still be sealed when you receive it. **_

_**I will see you soon Hime,**_

_** Itachi**_

"Itachi no Baka!" Gintsuki said as her hands covered her face, and her shoulders shook. "I wont see you, I'm called back to Isle Igen for a mandatory two year Chieftain's installment." she whispered to herself, and although she was feeling highly emotional at the moment, Gintsuki refused to cry.

Then next morning she was retrieved from the prison cell by her two sisters, Vaira and Tora. When they arrived the cell looked like... well how a prison cell should look. Aside from her usual bag they saw her putting a small summoning scroll and an envelope into her side pack. She looked up at them blankly. "Let's go home, I have a ceremony to attend and two years of my youth to waste attending counsel meetings, and filing paperwork. The sooner I get it done, the sooner I can return to traveling." she spoke flatly, as though she had no motivation to even be sarcastic. And her mood had not changed even after being home two months. If anything her mood worsened at the two month point.

~present time~

Gintsuki's P.O.V.

After I started acting depressed... well more so than usual, Vaira confronted me. I then told her about Itachi's self given time limit in the letter and told her that I was even more down cast then before because Itachi was surely home in Konoha by now, and he would no doubt learn of the Queen's installment I was bound to, if he hadn't before then. She sympathized with me for all of five minutes before taking the letter from me, and telling me that if I couldn't put in the effort and get my work done _properly_ for a week, then she would keep the letter. Needless to say I was back to my usual self at the end of the week and she gave my letter back to me. I kept it on my person at all times in-case she got the sinister idea to use it as leverage or something. Occasionally she would check on me while I was working. On grey days she would even help me do my filing. But that was pointless as I would hold all the counsel meetings in the morning starting at dawn, then do my filing, which was almost always done by three in the afternoon.

As soon as all the papers were properly taken care of I would jump out my office window, so as not to cross paths with counsel members, and then I would take off to the small Igen village on the outskirts of my Island, and help the poor folk who lived there.

My favorite family to visit lived on a farm near the edge of the forest. The farmer's wife had just given birth to there first child. A daughter they had named Ginyuuki. The 'Gin' symbol in her name was after my name, and I was incredibly honored that they loved me as there Queen enough to name their child after me. I was so honored that I found myself spoiling the baby in the months following. Which brings me to the present time.

I am currently on my way to visit the farmer Youki and his wife Nanami to give Ginyuuki a gift on her six month birthday. I had searched all over Isle Igen trying to find the perfect gift, and still hadn't found anything I liked. So I wrote to the Princess of the land of Snow and had a pendant made of silver in the shape of a snowflake for Ginyuuki. I had her parents' names inscribed with her own on the front, and the symbol of Hikari-Igen inscribed on the back.

I knocked on the door when I arrived, it was later in the afternoon than usual today, because we had a counsel meeting run until two pm. Which set me behind in my paperwork even though Vaira had gotten to it before me. Nanami opened the door and greeted me with a smile. "Gintsuki-sama, I figured you would come over today even if it killed you. Come in, please."

She teased as she saw the bags forming under my eyes. "Thank you Nanami-san, how is the little angel? I brought her a gift." I informed my friend. She shook her head at me.

"Gintsuki-sama I swear if you continue to spoil this child her whole life, then other subjects are going to be jealous and call it favoritism." Nanami scolded as she walked towards the Baby's room to retrieve Ginyuuki.

"Let them get jealous. I favor Ginyuuki because I feel a higher attachment to her then the other children of the village. She's probably either going to be a very strong water user, or a very gifted Genjutsu specialist." I explained, and it was true. I felt something in the small girl was connected to the Hikari blood flowing in me from my father. But no attachment in the Kage part inherit from my mother. I gave the pendant to the excited infant once I was holding her, and she seemed overjoyed that something shiny was handed to her.

"Its beautiful Gintsuki-sama, you didn't need to do so much for her." Nanami was scolding me again, though halfheartedly this time.

"Actually it's more for me than for her. I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, but I put an Igen Jutsu on it, if ever her life is in danger I'll be alerted as long as she's wearing the necklace. The only down side is I couldn't rig it to alert you or your husband, is it alright that I did this?" I explained the pendant, then asked anxiously hoping I didn't offend Nanami, or take things too far.

She smiled at me as her eyes began to tear. "Nanami? I'm sorry I really didn't mean to upset you by it..." I started freaking out, but she interrupted me.

"No. no its perfect Gintsuki-sama. Its just that.. Youki and I were going to ask you today... Youki get in here!" Nanami cut herself off when she heard her husband in the doorway.

"Oh Gintsuki-sama is here already... you didn't ask her without me did you?" Youki asked after shaking hands with me then standing next to his wife as I still held the baby.

"No, I was about to though. She's given Gin-chan an Igen pendant." Nanami explained.

"An Igen pendant! Wow..."

"Guys sorry to interrupt, but ask me what?" I asked getting increasingly curious.

"Sorry Gintsuki-sama." Youki began, "We were hoping, that you would take Ginyuuki as your first student when she comes of age."

"Of course excepting your youngest siblings. He means your first student from amongst your people, not your family." Nanami tried to explain.

A smile spread across my face. "You guys are family! Of course I'll train Ginyuuki. But only if she wants to become a ninja. I wont force her." I explained.

"Of course!" Youki announced. We celebrated the rest of the night and I didn't get in until right before the morning counsel meetings. I showered, changed my clothes, then sat through six hours of counsel bickering. It was now noon, and we still had three entirely different meetings to hold with the heads of our sister island. Both the islands used to be one huge village, but hundreds of years of erosion caused a small part to break loose, which is now called Isle Hime-sama. On it rests the palace in which Yuuki-hime-sama a great ancestor of mine, was once imprisoned by her father for wanting to marry an outsider shinobi of lower birth. I admire her for her success in love, but file her historical story away with the rest of the fairytales that don't happen in this age.

Back to reality. "Ladies and gentlemen, I motion to postpone the remaining meetings until this evening. We can all break for lunch, finish whatever work need be completed in our offices, and then simply complete our discussions here and go home for the night. I'm sure I'm not the only one present whom pulled an all nighter." I announced, there were several members whom agreed and the majority decided in favor of my motion.

I was stamping the last few papers on my desk, and just getting ready to put them into my cabinet when Vaira kicked in my office door. "You are fixing that V." I told her flatly as I finished filing my papers.

"I'll make Sasori do it after he gets done tending to your counsel crap for you. I told him to pay close attention and write everything down, even if it didn't seem important. Any motions he makes will be filed for you to review tomorrow afternoon, and any motions brought by the clan heads of Isle Hime-sama will be stamped and ready for your approval, or dismissal if that spoiled brat Kira is still asking for an indoor hot spring to be dug where the old temple is." Vaira explained.

"I see...And why wont I be attending my meetings?" I asked her, still flat and to the point bored out of my mind.

"Because you are going to have fun with me! I told Sasori I was taking you drinking, so if he asks, that's what you did, even if I didn't" She said with a wink.

"It's gonna take him three weeks to remember that I don't drink.. isn't it?" I asked still bored and then sighed. "Okay.. lets go swimming." I suggested, letting a small smile. I had already told her about Ginyuuki this morning and she'd celebrated then, so there was no reason to do anything but relax right now.

We hadn't been swimming an hour before the alarm was sounded over the island. "Damnit Vaira, can't your husband take notes without causing an international incident!" I said annoyed as we both quickly got dressed and grabbed our weapons.

"That's the intruder alarm, not the Kira's a brat alarm. Sorry to burst your bubble." She replied sarcastically while we were running for the village square where we could tell the fighting was taking place. Just inside the gate I saw dozens of guards surrounding the intruder closer towards the square. But at my feet were six unconscious guards.

"Vai look at this.. They aren't even injured, just unconscious." I realized.

"It's weird we would have an intruder at such a time. We haven't had one since Sasori came to ask for my hand." She replied contemplatively once we'd taken off towards the fighting again. It was then I saw who the intruder was.

"_STAND DOWN!_" I screamed in shock. My body froze while all my guards stopped fighting and stood there ground. Vaira was equally as speechless where she stood beside me.

"Tsuki-hime." Was all he said as he smirked at me.

"Throne room." I replied and ran past him towards the palace.

Once inside the throne room I closed the palace doors and had Vaira stand guard outside. I then assumed my place and stood before my thrown. "Why are you here Itachi?" I didn't want to hope...

"I am here to ask for your hand. Obviously." He replied amused. "But first..." he got onto his knees and bowed. "I beg your forgiveness. I said I would only take two months at most, and locating the island in fact has taken me six. My sincerest apologies Hime." He said sounding 100% regretful that finding the island had taken so long.

"You are forgiven...? Six months is nothing.. It took my ancestor nearly four years to find the island. And it was bigger back then... but you wouldn't know that... I'll explain later...I'm babbling! Itachi stand up and say something please!" Kami! I felt like a thirteen year old all over again.

"Very well Hime. I've also come to thank you in person for all you have done for my brother and I, as stated in the letter you received from Pein. I would also like to thank you on Sasuke's behalf. I encountered him some months ago and made my mission known to him, he asked me to pass along the message. And wished me luck on the engagement. Speaking of Hime, will you answer me?" He finished with one of his cocky smirks. Damn Uchiha trait!

"No." I said evenly. He looked shocked, and I think saddened but it was gone too quickly for me to tell for sure. And his gaze became calm and calculating as always.

"Might I inquire as to the reason for your refusal? I was under the impression you did love me Hime." he spoke in a gentler tone now. Kami Itachi! You can't do this to me, I'm not strong enough!

"I refuse to let you throw away finding love because you feel you need to repay me for what I've done for you and your brother. And I refuse to enter a marriage surviving only on a one sided love." I explained, refusing to meet his eyes, and NOT because of the Sharingan.

"So you refuse on the grounds of my questionable feelings and emotions in regards to you Hime?" he asked, the smirk evident even though I wasn't looking at him.

"You will be asked to partake in a memory wipe targeting all information you have on Hikarikage and Isle Igen. Though I really don't think its necessary, its protocol. I know you don't Love me, and this is the only thing I can think o..." I was suddenly speechless once more as he appeared in front of me. Mere inches away, and he held my chin in his hand so I would meet his gaze.

"No Gintsuki. You don't know. I love you." He said, then he smirked and added. "obviously."

my heart leaped into my throat and before I could respond, or even remember that oxygen was a necessity, he had captured my mouth with his own. He released my mouth a moment later and I smiled up at him, tears of joy streaming down my face.

"Well in that case, I'll accept your offer." I smiled again, then jokingly added, "Obviously." And he kissed me a second time, and while my eyes were still closed, I felt him slip his clan necklace around my neck then clasp it.

And thus began my life with Itachi. See if I give a damn that both Hikarikage Head daughters married formerly S-class criminal men back from the dead, these two men were given second chances, and in my opinion they are definitely living there second chances to the fullest!

_**Finish.****.****.**_


End file.
